Funny Away Messages
This page contains funny away messages that you can use with an instant messenger program. Enjoy!
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I am not available because I am playing a computer game that takes up the whole screen. Who am I kidding? I'm looking at porn.
- Submitted: December 16, 2003 @ 02:29 PM by by Bball5434
I'm in the shower... please do not flush the toilet What if the hokey pokey really is what it's all about? "We just went over your IQ test, and with the results I don't think you'll understand this..." Strike 1... Strike 2... Strike 3.... I'm out... "If an away message is posted on the Internet, but no one reads it, did that person ever really go away?" There's a killer in my house. I'm trying to call 911 but I can't find the 11. "Me Chinese, me play joke, me put pee pee in your Coke." My other away message is funny. "If you think life is bad..... How would you like to be an egg? You only get laid once. You only get eaten once. It takes four minutes to get hard. Only two minutes to get soft. You share your box with 11 other guys!! But worst of all...the only chick that ever sat on your face was your mother!!! So cheer up, your life isn't that bad!!!! " "Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again" I think this is a very good away message because it keeps the person who's reading it busy.. you say how?.. (read again) "If a kids asks """"why is it raining?"""" I think it is cute to tell them """"god is crying."""" If the child asks """"why is god crying?"""" I also think it is cute to tell them """"most likely because of something you did""""" Stuck in the away message factory... please send help! "Stay tuned, for when I return, we shall ponder the intersurreptible vicissitudes (with a hyperextended analysis of the pertaining relevancy of its esotericity) of the pseudoantidisestablishmentarianistic ideals. Bon pruneau!" "Not here right now because I am out enjoying life, you should try it sometime!" All I want to do is be more like me and less like you -Linkin Park "Apparently, my teachers are having a contest to see who could give out the most homework!!" I knew I was a nut the day the squirrel started looking at me funny! "I'm at school. Asking how school was is just like asking how the drive by shooting was, you don't care how it went, your just glad you got the hell out alive" "Once a boy asked his dad """"is God a boy or a girl?"""" his dad said both... then he asked """"is God black or white?"""" his dad said both... then he asked """"is God Michael Jackson?""""" I'm gone... you're here (give me a cookie for that one)! Out looking for Nemo Right now I have two hands caressing my hot steamy body... I'm in the freaking shower... You sick perv!!
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