Funny Away Messages

This page contains funny away messages that you can use with an instant messenger program. Enjoy!


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I sure hope life isn't just one big joke.. because I just don't get it
Submitted: February 18, 2004 @ 01:22 PM by by Heidi

"I'm at school. Yeah, you should probably be there too."
Submitted: February 4, 2004 @ 02:20 AM

I went dat way ----->
Submitted: January 23, 2004 @ 11:15 PM

Only fools leave away messages...DAMNIT
Submitted: February 2, 2004 @ 03:02 AM

"In the shower.. instead of the usual """"come and join me"""" I would rather see you sprawled out naked on my bed when I get back!"
Submitted: January 24, 2004 @ 08:41 PM

"Beer makes people smarter. Think about it...it made """"Bud wiser""""."
Submitted: February 7, 2004 @ 02:59 AM by by Russell G.

I'm out like Janet Jackson's boob at a halftime show!
Submitted: February 5, 2004 @ 07:34 AM by by David Holliday

I'm not here... Blame MTV...
Submitted: February 14, 2004 @ 08:43 AM by by Jai

"You are probably doing one of these two things: 1) Checking my profile to see what my away message is, so you don't have to I'm me and look stupid. 2) Feeling stupid because I know you are doing #1."
Submitted: January 7, 2004 @ 07:39 AM by by Sweetmandy151

"I'm sleeping...
And I find it kinda funny, I find it kinda sad
The dreams in which I???m dying are the best I???ve ever had "
Submitted: January 12, 2004 @ 04:23 PM

I'm Eating ... I wish I got more than bread and water in this damn place
Submitted: January 4, 2004 @ 10:32 PM

"If you think life is bad..... How would you like to be an egg? You only get laid once. You only get eaten once. It takes four minutes to get hard. Only two minutes to get soft. You share your box with 11 other guys!! But worst of all...the only chick that ever sat on your face was your mother!!! So cheer up, your life isn't that bad!!!!"
Submitted: January 5, 2004 @ 06:39 AM by by Skipster

I'm currently staring at the back of my eyelids...
Submitted: December 14, 2003 @ 06:01 PM by by Nio

"Cry Me a River, Build me a Bridge, and tell me when you done so we can go for a walk!"
Submitted: January 4, 2004 @ 06:12 AM by by People Person

Watching American Idol*

*not gay
Submitted: January 30, 2004 @ 08:01 PM

I do what they say and choose the road less traveled.... Now where the heck am I?
Submitted: January 21, 2004 @ 06:31 AM

I can finally go outside again! Saddam has been caught!
Submitted: December 14, 2003 @ 05:32 PM

BRB I have to go to the bathroom ..oh shi... never mind :(
Submitted: December 24, 2003 @ 04:35 PM by by Bill

Who ever said being alone wasn't fun... hasn't been alone with me
Submitted: December 24, 2003 @ 06:34 AM

"Riddle: How Long is a China Man
Answer: Yes he is

Think about that while I'm gone!"""
Submitted: December 28, 2003 @ 06:11 AM

I do what the cheerios tell me!
Submitted: December 21, 2003 @ 06:10 AM

"Now I lay me down to study, I pray the lord I don't go nutty, If I should fail to learn this junk, I pray the lord I will not flunk, but if I do, don't pity me at all, jus lay my bones in the hall, then lay my books upon my desk, Now I lay me down me down to rest, I pray I'll pass tomorrows test, and if I should die before I wake, That's one less test I have to take. ;)"
Submitted: December 13, 2003 @ 06:33 PM by by Linz

Hey I'm feeling tired
My time is gone today
Submitted: December 29, 2003 @ 08:33 AM by by Korn

I'm having amnesia and deja vu at the same time. I think I've forgotten this before.
Submitted: January 5, 2004 @ 09:11 PM by by Kaleala

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Notice: We are no longer accepting new Away Message submissions. If you want to submit a Funny Status Message view the Funny Status Messages page.