Funny Away Messages

This page contains funny away messages that you can use with an instant messenger program. Enjoy!

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Everywhere but here!

Just plea the 5th- or drink it- either way.

My dog ate my away message.

"Splish, splash, I am taking a bath. "

"Out of my mind, be back in 5 minutes. "

We live in an age when pizza gets to your home before the police.

The best cure for insomnia is to get a lot of sleep.

The best way to make your dreams come true is to wake up.

I'm trick or treating on the highway in a deer costume. Be right back.

Submitted: by by Jessie

Watching HBO... but I'll get back to you at a commercial break

I am working hard... or am I hardly working?

SHHH...I'm sleeping...dreaming about...you...ah...NIGHTMARE...hurry up someone wake me up!

My mother told me never talk to strangers. That's why I never talk to myself anymore.

"It is generally agreed that ""Hello"" is an appropriate greeting because if you entered a room and said ""Goodbye,"" it could confuse a lot of people. "

You're on a collision course with reality!

Submitted: by by Nicky

Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7th of your life.

Ooo... there goes the shirt... Ooo.. there goes the pants... Ooo... there goes the rest.. Ahhhh... you sick people.. I'm in the shower.. BBL!!

"I am studying, which is something that you should be doing. "

Message Under Construction

Apparently my teachers are having a contest to see who can give out the most homework

Submitted: by by Alexis

"Last night I lay in my bed gazing up at the stars and I wondered...""Where'd the ceiling go?!"" "

"Sorry %n(Their Screen name), I'm studying right now... but next time I decide to procrastinate, I'll get back to you."

Are you too gullible? Have $1000? We can cure you...Click Here

"I'm hot, wet, and wishing you were here. Actually, I'm in the shower, but I'll be back later. "

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Notice: We are no longer accepting new Away Message submissions. If you want to submit a Funny Status Message view the Funny Status Messages page.

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