Funny Status Messages and Tweets

   One day... Facebook, Youtube, Myspace and Friendster will come together as one. It will be called, FookYouMyFriend.

   the hardest part of working in a restaurant is how your throat hurts after spitting in all those orders

   Just saw a baby with a shirt that said, not everything stays in Vegas.

   Buckwheat Word Of The Day: Dictate "I aks Darla wen she give me a bIow job how my dictate."

   I won't believe Obama is black until he shows me his irresponsible father certificate.

   R.I.P. Amanda Todd ..We will miss you . . <----------------

   in bed by 9, and home by 11..

   Thinks Whitney had her own pre-grammy party. grammy of coke, grammy of heroin, grammy of.......

   Today I saw a baby with a bib that said "This dumbass put my cape on backwards."

   • BoyfriEND, girlfriEND, friEND. Everything has an END, except family.

   . Glad trump has not accomplished anything. If he had, we be worse off then we are now.

   Actors like Carrie Fisher claimed Trump would never be their president. I hope the others follow her lead!

   this country is not ran by democracy, but by communism.

   supports the "Obama Is Too Damn High Party"!!!

   Congratulations to Amy Winehouse... on 4 months of sobriety.

   "focus- Oh look, a squirrel! "

   I tried Obama's 1-800 number...... It's is a disaster too. Your best bet is to stuff an ObamaCare application into a bottle and throw it in the ocean.

   dancing naked on your roof.

   the answer

   And Jesus said to His disciples, "Follow me....on twitter."