Funny Status Messages and Tweets

   if you are reading this you love lesbians!

   If this God wanted to impress me with his miracles, he would've impregnanted Joseph and not a poor, unwed teenage girl. That sh|t happens everyday.

   Don't stand up for the national anthem = USA hater. Don't stand up & pay taxes to support the national infrastructure = genius businessman?

   Trump really trying to take credit for Obama's 227,000 added jobs in January? Smh.....

   A lot of people make fun of the stuff Glenn Beck says. But don't forget he also has a really stupid face

   Try this experiment: The next time someone says "Oh, I'm fine..." look them square in the eyes and say "Tell me the truth." Sometimes all people really want is someone to take an interest. Show them you care all the time, not just at Christmas.

   Girls are superheros cause who else could bleed for 5 days and not die!?

   God never made a smart atheist... even tho many of the fools claim to be

   Thinks that since Michael Jackson was 90% plastic, they should melt him down and turn him into Legos so little kids can play with him for a change.

   Donald Trump looks like the nasty businessman in a Disney movie who loses out to a six year-old and his dog.

   Obama is in town. Traffic is bad. I won't be able to vote for him in 2012 because I'll still be sitting in my car.

   We should agree on removing Boehner from government. He is an idiot, and his lacky supporters in the background need to push him off a cliff.....waisting American time only to finally pass the tax Bill!

   you can post the Ten Commandments in the courthouse, if you let us post the statutes regarding child molestation in your church

   So who was this Maya Angelou? Was she the one that wouldn't give up her seat on the bus?

   When Obamacare kicks in, I gets free healthcare, Right? Axing for a friend...

   marking his territory.

   the doctor looked at it his watch for Michael's time of death. The big hand was touching the little hand.

   "busy, you're ugly, have a nice day"

   History lessons in our time whr easy, at least people fought for a purpose, feel sorry for next generation to keep up with the History

   thinks that playing tag with sprinters is the 2nd least fun game in the world. second only to playing on a seesaw with a sumo wrestler.