Danmanz Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon It's Thanksgiving. Don't forget to set your scale forward 45 lbs. ahead.
←Rate | 11-22-2012 00:11 by Danmanz Comments (1)  


   messageicon Dear Kanye West,--- Take the diaper off your daughter and put it around your face. A lot of crap has been coming from it lately
←Rate | 12-11-2013 06:21 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon if a person starts a sentence with, "Not to sound like an a**hole..." Guess what they're gonna sound like....?
←Rate | 09-15-2011 16:55 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon why is it that whenever there's two women in a profile pic the hot one is always someone else..?
←Rate | 09-16-2009 21:09 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon It would make your mother proud if you could NOT, walk, talk, spell, and wear your damn pants like you were raised by a rap video your whole life.
←Rate | 03-23-2010 15:34 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon I love a Thanksgiving turkey... it's the only time in Los Angeles that you see natural breasts.
←Rate | 11-26-2009 08:08 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon why can't Twitter just die already?
←Rate | 03-03-2010 03:45 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dear Taliban, When you shoot a kid in the head for wanting an education and she doesn't die, how can you be sure that God is on your side?
←Rate | 10-26-2012 14:13 by Danmanz Comments (2)  


   messageicon Facebook: the only book teens read these days.
←Rate | 01-22-2010 14:50 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon You can do a thousand GOOD things and a a hundred GREAT things. But if you do just one BAD thing, people will remember you for that.
←Rate | 03-23-2010 15:26 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon It cost 7 million dollars to build the Titanic and 200 million to make a film about it....That's Hollywood
←Rate | 04-20-2012 22:05 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon Edward Snowden: Provides evidence that the government is spying on us......Government charges him for spying...
←Rate | 06-26-2013 16:13 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon My homework brings all the Asians to the yard, and they're like "It wasn't that hard"
←Rate | 10-27-2012 15:31 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon I refuse to lower my standards to accommodate those who refuse to raise theirs.
←Rate | 01-04-2013 23:13 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon The only people mad at you for speaking the TRUTH are the ones living a LIE.
←Rate | 12-28-2011 22:52 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon Bill Clinton has been acting funny ever since Michael Douglas made that oral sex comment.
←Rate | 06-15-2013 10:33 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon Thank you Pringles┬« for being the only chip company that doesn't sell air.
←Rate | 01-28-2013 01:39 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon Biggest Social Networking Crime: You haven't seen someone for years; you vaguely recognize their name but not their face. They add you as a friend on Facebook and then after you accept them, you never hear from them again.
←Rate | 03-18-2010 03:43 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon When the government fears the people, it's called Liberty. When the people fear the government, it's called Tyranny.
←Rate | 06-27-2012 17:32 by Danmanz Comments (2)  


   messageicon Celebrating 6 yrs of a social epidemic.Congrats Facebook for connecting people with friends;old,new,and weird. Using up people's time online. Poking as many women as possible.F*cking up relationships/marriages,and checking up on people's exaggerated lives
←Rate | 02-05-2010 12:57 by Danmanz Comments (0)  



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