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Cyanide, the one pill prescription cure all. . . 
Apparently when you walk in and your boss is listening to" Sister Christian ".... You AREN'T supposed to ask if it's couples skate only
Light beer and turkey bacon probably won't kill you but why take the chance??
Moral compass? Is there an app for that?
I'm at my most popular when I just want to be alone.
I like you, but not 'get dressed and leave the house to see you', like you.
Why can't people tolerate a touch of their own medicine?
now only 2 for $2 (only at participating locations, some restrictions may apply, see store for details, offer void where prohibited)
first there was mad cow disease, then bird flu, and now swine flu........OMFG it's FARMAGGEDDON!
Ed, Farrah, Michael, and now Billy Mays? WTF Hollywood!!!
if love is blind why is lingerie so popular
taking his 1st Karate lesson today @ the Ho Lee Chit Karate School
just watched CSI: Ozarks. The case went unsolved. Everyone's DNA was the same and there were no dental records.
Let's promise we'll always stay close friends but ultimately settle for periodic glances at each other's Facebook status updates
stuck in the red twisty tube at chuck e cheese....being poked at and laughed at by brats!
Wondering if Google searches John Tesh for answers.
busy kidnapping yard gnomes.
Well that's funny...actions do not speak louder than words when you're beating a mime.
She's got more issues than your dad's porn stash.
my facebook wall is not the best way for me to respond to you Quicker,.. You'll have better luck getting a hold of me if you were to shout my name inside your own home... well,.. I guess depending on the situation." 