Trump Filter: ON | OFF
Search Messages:
Men underestimate us we reach our full potential which is crazy illogical overeactions. 
If I don't clean my house soon, someone is going to bring in blindfolded ppl for a Frebreeze commercial.
I Shout out to all the beautiful women who don't need to dress half naked to get a mans attention.. Stay classy!!
Voting is like pressing the walk button at an intersection. It doesn't change anything, but if you wait long enough you'll get the white guy
My pregnant blond girlfriend found out she was having twins, she started cry, and said I don't want to wait 18 months for twins to be born.
Jesus says to John come forth I'll give you eternal life. John came fifth he won a toaster
The only reason Barbie never got pregnant, was Ken came in a different box.
He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
When does paying taxes get shut down? Asking for everyone with a job.
Always tell your daughters they're beautiful, and you love them. There's enough selfies on Facebook already.
Angry sex is way better than an angry blow job.
My wife likes to talk during sex. Stuff like: "Why is the bathroom door locked?!?" and "What are you doing in there?"
Science is for people who like to think about what's being told. Religion is for people who like to be told what to think.
Please, always tell your daughters they're beautiful, and you love them. There's enough selfies on Facebook already.
Do people that go outside know they could die and stuff?
I am not sure, but I think I just heard my cup of coffee say, "You are my b*tch"
Thanks to the presence of fools, wise people stand out.
Facetious: The only word in the English dictionery to use all the vowels in a row. a.e.i.o.u.
Science is for the egotistical that think man has all the answers
it aint about obama its about yo mama 