love Funny Status Messages

   " For It was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart. It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul. It was not my hand you held but my love. "

   I love to laugh but on this day I am remembering the Love and Sacrifice that Jesus did so that we could be saved.Amen !!

   Love doesn't cost a thing; except tears, a broken heart, wasted years and half your stuff.

   11 year olds today: "Omg I love smokin pot. I get like so drunk. Yolo!" Me when I was 11: "I can't wait to go home and play Club Penguin!

   Wishes my lovehandles would love somebody else!

   Roses are red; foxes are clever. I love your butt; let me touch it forever.

   THINGS THAT ARE DAMN HARD TO FIND: 1. A phone on silent 2. Fat girl's clitoris 3. True love

   Catholic school taught me two things: One is that God loves me and I'm going to burn in hell. The other is that sex is the most awful, filthy thing on Earth and I should save it for someone I love.

   I am not a vegetarian because I love animals. I am a vegetarian because I hate plants

   If you love your farts you have to let them go.

   Amy Schneider looks like the love child of Fred Flintstone and Barney Rubble.

   "i would do anything for love, but I won't do that...or that, or that, or that, or that, or that"

   Late every Sunday night, all other the stores in the mall go and tell Radio Shack not to worry about what other people think, they still love him

   I dont believe in love, but I believe in sex.

   Look just cuz I wont go by you tampons doesn't mean I don't love you...Hell didn't I buy you like 3 rolls of Bounty...That's called a Compromise...

   love can conquer anything, no matter how bad it gets it can always be forgiven by agreeing to put it behind you and getting on with being happy together.

   The only 2 things that I love and enjoy about being an adult is having sex and drinking alcohol.

   I'd love to hear about your weekend plans just give me a second to put on my airplane neck pillow.

   Well here I am, sitting on the pavement with my pork pies, sandwiches, & beer. Flying my union jack flag, cheering at the top of my voice with British pride as the procession goes past. Dont you just love muslim funerals.

   When gays hack into their gay mate's facebook accounts, do they change the status to, “I'M STRAIGHT AND I LOVE EATING PU$$Y!”?