Exercise Funny Status Messages

   If you sweat when you eat, does it count as exercise?

   my wife said I drink too much and don't exercise enough. So I stole her pedometer. Half mile so far from the living room to the fridge!

   I was on the exercise bike for almost 30 minutes just now. It was pretty easy. Tomorrow I may even try using the pedals.

   I really have no idea what a Kardashian is but,,,, From what I can gather, it's an exercise bike for basketball players.

   My Dr told me to start my exercise program slowly, so today I drove past a store that sells sweatpants..

   After exercising I always eat a Pizza. Just Kidding, I don't exercise !!

   I tried exercise but I was allergic to it. My skin flushed and my heart raced. I got sweaty and short of breath. Very dangerous.

   My exercise program consists of having a lot of stairs in my home,, and forgetting things.

   My favorite exercise after a heavy meal is regret.

   I didn't text you just to exercise my fingers, I was expecting a reply back...

   a tip to reduce weight, first turn your head to the left and then turn it to the right. Repeat this exercise every time you are offered something to eat.

   it's very important to exercise as we get older. my uncle started walking 5 miles a day when he was 65. today he's 90 and we haven't a sweet jesus clue where he is.

   If it weren't for the fact that the TV set and the refrigerator are so far apart, some of us wouldn't get any exercise at all.

   When I exercise at the gym, I wear all black. It's like a funeral for my fat.

   Yes, people who exercise live longer. But those extra years are spent...umm...excercising!

   Some people are so lazy, they would actually quit having sex if someone just told them its a good form of exercise

   Sex: It might be good exercise, but that's not why we do it!

   How many exercise/workout videos does a person have to buy before seeing results?

   Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government

   I signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear loose fitting clothing. If I HAD any loose fitting clothing, I wouldn't have signed up in the first place!