Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
Page: 5016 of 6370
picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue!
←Rate |
04-09-2009 18:43
Comments (0)
knows is all. I just cant remember it all at once!
←Rate |
06-09-2009 19:47 by katie
Comments (0)
if you bet an emo kid 20 bucks that he won't kill himself, you'll either be 20 bucks richer or break even
←Rate |
11-20-2009 21:26
Comments (0)
wonders why there is no swine flu in Iran and asks if it is because of veils or not
←Rate |
11-27-2009 12:46
Comments (0)
Help me, My stomach is eating my throat.......this is a job for pizza man....
←Rate |
06-29-2010 21:48 by Corey C
Comments (0)
wondering did someone ever give Sean Paul the light
←Rate |
07-06-2010 13:54
Comments (0)
WTF? You look like you've been slapped by the Devil....!!!
←Rate |
07-29-2010 11:31 by @Steady
Comments (0)
if you want to feel skinny....hang out with a group of fat people!
←Rate |
12-10-2010 22:34 by mullerman
Comments (0)
I'm thinking about suing the US postal service over their slogan "If it fits~It ships".... If that were true I'd be on my way to Hawaii right now.....
←Rate |
12-16-2010 19:44 by clutzy
Comments (0)
Mrs Claus must get quite lonely this time of year. Hmm...think I'll take a ride up to the north pole tonight. ;0)
←Rate |
12-24-2010 07:17
Comments (0)
I was going to go to the gym and run 7 miles tomorrow morning to continue trying to look good but then I remembered I own Photoshop like some of you guys.
←Rate |
12-26-2010 21:40 by BEGO
Comments (0)
So happy Regis Philbin is finally retiring...I hear he's been trying to vacate his stool for years.
←Rate |
01-22-2011 11:10 by GaryB
Comments (0)
Question: IF you have a Harley and all the black assessories like HD T-shirt, Chaps, Gloves, Bandananana, booties..everything ... do you really need to go out and rent an Halloween Outfit? :)
just asked a group of people for a lighter. They thought she was homeless, asking for money. She's wearing false lashes. When was the last time you saw a homeless person with false lashes?
←Rate |
11-13-2010 08:54
Comments (0)
When it comes to rotating the view of a picture or PDF, every bit of my sense of clock-wise or counter clock-wise goes right out the window.
←Rate |
04-07-2010 16:07
Comments (0)
has served enough burnt offerings at dinner that my husband is beginning to think he's a god.
Some dog I got. We call him Egypt because in every room he leaves a pyramid. His favorite bone is in my arm. Last night he went on the paper four times - three of those times I was reading it.
←Rate |
04-14-2010 17:19 by Reed
Comments (0)
I think we should all look to other serious controversial environmental issues for guidance when we think of a punishment for the BP CEO. I think we should club him like a baby seal !! Then we can run a commercial saying that we are sorry for the mess w
←Rate |
06-10-2010 14:55
Comments (0)
attempting to give a damn: ███████████████████] 99% Complete... ERROR!: Unable to give a damn.
←Rate |
06-11-2010 13:38 by Nate
Comments (0)
How many damn vampire movies and shows has there been since Dracula up until Twilight Saga?.....Somewhere between the number of 40 and overkill of film.
←Rate |
06-22-2010 17:56 by Danmanz
Comments (0)