Nate Funny Status Messages

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   messageicon If you want the most accurate, real-time weather reports, look out your damn window.
←Rate | 09-04-2013 23:18 by Nate Comments (0)  

   messageicon went to Wal-Mart this afternoon and discovered that some people think Febreeze is a substitution for doing laundry.
←Rate | 11-12-2010 10:28 by Nate Comments (1)  

   messageicon Have you noticed that since everyone has a camcorder these days no one talks about seeing UFOs anymore.
←Rate | 11-09-2011 14:43 by NATE Comments (0)  

   messageicon asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.
←Rate | 09-26-2009 07:37 by Nate Comments (0)  

   messageicon The epitome of laziness is vacuuming your kitchen floor. Yeah, I've done it.
←Rate | 10-04-2011 21:29 by Nate Comments (0)  

   messageicon ..after reading the side effects – pale stools, facial tics, constipation, sore throat, hives, chest pain & mouth sores – for erectile dysfunction pills, I've come to a rational conclusion: It's totally worth it.
←Rate | 07-28-2011 23:29 by Nate Comments (0)  

   messageicon outside the bathroom you're an American. Inside the bathroom...European.
←Rate | 07-21-2010 16:28 by Nate Comments (0)  

   messageicon I don't care what you say, fat girls are beautiful a distance.....of 300 or more feet.
←Rate | 04-12-2013 21:20 by Nate Comments (0)  

   messageicon contrary to what many believe, there are actually 3 rings to marriage: the engagement ring, the wedding ring and the suffering.
←Rate | 10-04-2010 09:44 by Nate Comments (0)  

   messageicon thinks there is nothing worse than accidently sitting on your reeses peanut butter cup at the beginning of your work shift.
←Rate | 03-30-2010 18:31 by Nate Comments (0)  

   messageicon attempting to give a damn: ███████████████████] 99% Complete... ERROR!: Unable to give a damn.
←Rate | 06-11-2010 13:38 by Nate Comments (0)  

   messageicon finally decided to Tie the Knot... the Four-in-Hand Necktie Knot - it's really the easiest to tie.
←Rate | 07-07-2010 11:47 by Nate Comments (0)  

   messageicon you can pick your friends and you can pick your nose, but you should never, under any circumstances, pick your friend's nose.
←Rate | 08-15-2010 20:15 by Nate Comments (1)  


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