Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
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Remember girls your mouth can't get pregnant. 
Say no to commercialized enterprise Christianity.
RIP 2012 (2012-2012)
Filipinos: The Mexicans of the Asian Race
Did Obama really sign a bill in secret making free speech illegal during protests???? So the first amendment is almost gone. Liberty is truly dying by the months.
I think that Americans should be less concerned about Donald Trump's hair, and more concerned with the screw that came loose underneath it.
You remember the good ol days when you used to get mad at someone if they didn't have you as a friend on their top Myspace list?
Are orphans allowed to watch PG movies?
Dang it,I went to the dog park this morning and accidentally stepped in a pile of Hillary.
The fastest way to stop "terrorism" is to stop screwing around with other peoples countries.
Watching my favorite show. "Keeping Up With Obamas Lies"
took his ex out last night... only took one punch.
The police have trained sniffer dogs to identify criminals who are carrying guns, coke and cash. Or "Mexicans", as I prefer to call them.
There once was a team called the Steelers, who thought they were real death dealers. Then out of the back came the Big Green Pack and turned them all into squealers!
1 out of every 3 Obama supporters are as stupid as the other two
Wife: honey I want you to whisper dirty things in my ear! Husband: kitchen, living room, dinning room, patio...now go clean them and make me a sandwich on your way back...
No Lady Gaga, ou weren't born that way. We can all see your Adam's Apple. Its sort of gross.
An Arab invented the original mechanical clock, which is odd since Arabs are never on time.
gave up drinking and smoking... Worst ten minutes of my life.
Real Men of Genius.Today we salute you Mr.Compulsive Status Update Checker.People are out actually having fun, your stuck reading about it on a screen. One click instant "mafia and farmville" updates to live vicariously through, friends you... haven't see 