Mom or Mother Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Amal and Juan are identical twins. Their mother only carries one photo, because if you’ve seen Juan, you’ve seen Amal.
←Rate | 04-26-2022 20:10 Comments (0)  


   messageicon A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but mean your mother.
←Rate | 05-18-2022 00:45 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Its still winter because Mother Nature saw all our summer bodies and decided we weren't ready yet.
←Rate | 04-17-2018 19:12 by @UncleBSolomon Comments (0)  


   messageicon The penalty for bigamy is having two mother in-laws.
←Rate | 02-05-2019 16:03 by Joker Comments (0)  


   messageicon Let’s join our hands together and pray for my husband who very tragically compared me to my mother.
←Rate | 06-29-2020 10:01 Comments (0)  


   messageicon My 72 year-old mother just informed me she is going to her first “sex party” and doesn’t know what to bring. After some delicate questioning, “Gender Reveal, Mom. It’s called a Gender Reveal.”
←Rate | 06-19-2020 08:30 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Well, I guess we are going to see "The Nutcracker" on Saturday! My mother-in-law, not the play.......
←Rate | 12-15-2018 00:20 by JeffW Comments (0)  


   messageicon Where would I be without my mother? Probably in the middle of traffic, without my jacket on, talking to some stranger.
←Rate | 06-06-2011 21:52 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't care how old I am. If I lose my mother in a super market I'm going to panic.
←Rate | 11-30-2012 04:57 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon If your relationship fails, don't blame her. It takes two people to mess up a relationship. Blame her and her mother.
←Rate | 03-18-2021 19:39 by Gripenfelter Comments (0)  


   messageicon This year my mother gave my son a drum set for Christmas. Which surprised me. I said to her don't you remember how you hated it when I played the drums when I was a kid? She replyed with a smile , I remember.
←Rate | 01-11-2020 19:06 by Starman Comments (0)  


   messageicon My mother-in-law came to visit, I asked, "How long are you going to stay?" She said, "As long as you want me to." I said, "You're not even going to stay for coffee?"
←Rate | 11-10-2010 11:28 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon I hope all you moms out there had a great Mother's Day! (If you're not a mom but would like to be, message me for details)
←Rate | 05-10-2011 16:15 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Ok honey don't freak out, but someone broke into the house, ate all the ice cream, smashed that picture of your mother, and didn't do the dishes.
←Rate | 03-16-2012 03:52 by Zinc Comments (0)  


   messageicon To all the Mothers and Grandmothers out there, whether here on Earth or an Angel in Heaven: Thank you for teaching us all we know. Being a mother is not easy.
←Rate | 05-07-2011 21:44 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dear Mother-in-law, "Don't teach me how to handle my children, I am living with one of yours and he needs a lot of improvement"
←Rate | 05-09-2011 17:01 Comments (0)  


   messageicon It would make your mother proud if you could NOT, walk, talk, spell, and wear your damn pants like you were raised by a rap video your whole life.
←Rate | 03-23-2010 15:34 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon My mother said, "You won't amount to anything because you procrastinate." I said, "Oh ya.....Just you wait."
←Rate | 06-13-2011 14:52 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Shut up, you'll never be the man your mother is
←Rate | 11-15-2010 19:16 by Esoteric Comments (0)  


   messageicon Where are the realistic Mother's Day cards that say, "Well you did the best you could with what you had and I still love you anyways."
←Rate | 05-10-2015 08:50 Comments (0)  




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