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Got a flannel sweater for the 9th year in a row. Thanks mom! Can't wait to see what I get next year.
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12-24-2010 21:57 by
Will
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Crying doesn't indicate that you're weak. Since birth, it has been a sign that you're alive.
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12-28-2010 17:51
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says if someone questions your motives for doing something, throw them off by saying "I did it to protect you"
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01-21-2011 11:13 by
Yaj
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If I had a year to live, I would spend it with my ex... because it would be the longest year of my life.
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06-15-2012 22:04 by
BEGO
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0
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Yes, that's correct!.....And the Horse you rode in on!!
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07-04-2012 15:28 by
Abraham lincoln
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0
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The only Spanish phrase you need to learn is, "I know you guys are talkin sh*t about me."
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05-04-2012 22:11 by
Aaron
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The guy who invented "Take Your Child To Work Day" probably forgot to drop his kid off at school on the way to work.
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05-15-2012 11:17 by
SEAN
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0
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I'm so gangsta that I change the channels holding the remote sideways.
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10-17-2011 13:15 by
Marshall the Great
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0
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I like to lift my feet up so the person in the stall next to me thinks it's a ghost that has diarrhea.
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11-03-2011 10:28 by
Aaron
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0
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Dracula + Tinkerbell = Edward Cullen. He is not a VAMPIRE. He doesn't feed on PEOPLE, he lives in the forest, and he sparkles. He is CLEARLY a Fairy.
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11-08-2011 01:12 by
Ninja
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Today, I learned if you dream you're having a piss, you most likely are having a piss.
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11-10-2011 20:25 by
BEGO
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Yea, I end a Facebook conversation by hitting the (LIKE) button on the last comment.
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03-11-2012 00:25 by
Franks & Beans
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0
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If your house is hit by a dolphin, don't go outside to see if the dolphin is alright, that's how the hurricane tricks you to come outside.
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03-18-2012 15:35 by
K-Mac
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0
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I would really like to help you move your furniture tomorrow but I'm going to be too busy sitting on mine.
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03-24-2012 10:17 by
SuthernFukr
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I don't have a pet,, so I adopted this spider, but the stupid thing won't even chase the laser pen,,, It's got 8 eyes so I *know* he sees it.
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04-01-2012 17:39 by
snotty
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0
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Lord Almighty, Adele...REALLY ?,, Just burn his house down & get on with your life already.
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04-02-2012 07:49 by
snotty
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0
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I don't know if getting everything I want would make me happy, but the opposite is not working at all.
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12-26-2011 07:56 by
hihuggiehi
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0
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Silence is the best answer to a stupid question.
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01-10-2012 13:28
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I washed the car with my son today. Worst.sponge.EVER.
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01-29-2012 09:27 by
SuthernFukr
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I always learn from the mistake of others who take my advice
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01-30-2012 13:04 by
Tsparks
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