Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

   Can we stop with all the stupid religion posts?! So you guys have differing opinions.. GREAT! Take it somewhere else-

   My wife and I have two very different ideas of what 'Sunrise Service' means.

   Jesus is ALIVE! Happy Easter

   Do you ever wish you had a second chance to meet someone again for the first time?

   hope it isnt wrong to put leftover Halloween candy in their Easter baskets.

   Today is EASTER GRASS bake day!!

   Looked all over and found no eggs,they were stacked neatly in a carton ,uncolored in the fridge...well played Easter bunny ..well played!!

   And then He said, "Don't be feedin any more homeless people until you have LED screens with this week's sermon in front of all my churches"

   How I met your mother? Well son, it was arranged.

   If she eats pizza with a fork, she isn't going to like being bent over the dining room table.

   When I said "We have chemistry between us" I just meant I roofied your drink

   Another fine day ruined by responsibility.

   Auto correct just changed my ex's name to deceitful sh*t talking money grubbing never in the mood for sex b*tch Weird

   Anyone else find it disgusting when someone in the shower slides the bar soap between their cheeks to clean themselves? Asking for my wife.

   I might be white, but I'm not "saves plastic grocery bags to use for trash can liners" white.

   Your "I Love My Wife" bumper sticker simply means you'd lose a fistfight against a loaf of bread.

   You call it a cry for help, I call it the reason for a ball gag.

   He has risen!!! But only to use the bathroom, now I am going back to bed.

   You don't have to believe in a book to be a nice person and treat people right.

   Hey, guy from the gym with lifting gloves still on, you can take them off now, you're in Starbucks.