Funny Status Messages for FacebookStatus message updates and sayings for your Facebook, Twitter, or profile.
X THEY'RE going THERE with THEIR friends. Seriously it's not rocket science.
X fears Hurricane Earl, but only because it sounds like the prison nickname of a man wearing overalls who beat someone to death with a banjo.
X I thought they put covers on books SO I could judge them.
X X Did you Just say somthing, or did your brain fart..
X Some people should "dance like no one's looking" where I can't see them.
X When outdoors use the buddy system... if a wild animal approaches push your buddy toward it and run like hell
X It's only cheating if you get caught. Well, if you never get caught, you're stuck in two meaningless relationships.
X The postage is outrageous on these mail order brides!
X is says the people I work with are making me crazy, I think there should be some kind of test for babies in the delivery room. If the test shows they're going to grow up stupid they should be neutered immediately.
X Well today was a total waste of makeup.
X says Catching a yellow-jacket in your shirt at seventy miles per hour can double your vocabulary.
X It's income tax time again, Americans: time to gather up those receipts, get out those tax forms, sharpen up that pencil, and stab yourself in the aorta.
X You can make the same drive 100's of times but a good dense fog makes it feel like a totally new experience.
X says a little less conversation, a little more action please!!
X is trying to give me the finger is like giving a spider the web. I'm just gonna spin it and use it to my advantage =)
X What? That's not what "do the robot" means? It's a dance? Oh god. I am SO sorry about your robot.
X The Old Lie: "The check is in the mail." The New Lie: "I haven't checked my email."
X Politician : One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence after.
X has just admitted himself into the hokey pokey institute...I figure it a way to turn my life around.
X Thinks that if I was a zookeeper, I wouldn't even bother putting anything in the chameleon exhibit.