santa AND presents AND christmas AND xmas AND holidays AND elfs Funny Status Messages

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   messageicon Am I the only person who feels like Christmas didn't even happen?
←Rate | 01-04-2016 17:37 by @1_Jack_Jacko Comments (0)  

   messageicon Slightly used Christmas tree only one month old. Paid $60. Looking for $40. No low ballers. Serious inquiries only. Come on let's get this thing done.
←Rate | 01-02-2016 19:17 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Now that the holidays are finally over, my family can go home and I can start masturbating in my own house again.
←Rate | 12-31-2015 15:06 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Christmas. It's been a long 2 1/2 months.
←Rate | 12-26-2015 10:11 by Aaron Comments (0)  

   messageicon I hate being sick at Christmas. My wife says I'm not sick, but I was just jacking it while looking at a picture of a fat nun pissing on a hot schools girl. How is that not sick.
←Rate | 12-26-2015 10:06 Comments (0)  

   messageicon athiests are awful quite Xmas morning
←Rate | 12-25-2015 14:58 Comments (1)  

   messageicon I saw Mommy kissing Santa Claus; then I saw her helping him empty his sack.
←Rate | 12-25-2015 09:31 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Santa came down the chimney, at half past three. W
←Rate | 12-25-2015 09:01 Comments (0)  

   messageicon As much as Santa came last night I bet he will sleep for a week
←Rate | 12-25-2015 08:31 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Merry Christmas! Happy Holidays! Season's Greetings! Nice Tits!... Whatever your particular thing is, I hope it's a joyful one! :)
←Rate | 12-24-2015 18:44 Comments (0)  

   messageicon My ornaments are starting to droop. Yeah, time to ask Santa for new underwear.
←Rate | 12-24-2015 15:36 by svaldez187 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Enough with the pro-Xmas vs con-Xmas: IT IS FESTIVUS!
←Rate | 12-23-2015 21:30 Comments (0)  

   messageicon All I want for Christmas is lots of bubble wrap
←Rate | 12-23-2015 21:22 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Thank You Santa for helping make Christianity less believable than it already was
←Rate | 12-23-2015 21:20 Comments (0)  

   messageicon If you're atheist so don't celebrate Christmas
←Rate | 12-23-2015 21:06 Comments (1)  

   messageicon Today is the official day for guys to start their Xmas shopping
←Rate | 12-23-2015 09:41 Comments (0)  

   messageicon I'm an adult and I still believe in Santa clause, I figure why not? There's still adults who believe in Obama.
←Rate | 12-23-2015 04:49 Comments (1)  

   messageicon Teach your child what's going on in the world by telling them Santa was killed in a drone strike in a no fly zone; or he's being held up in the vetting process.
←Rate | 12-19-2015 07:09 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Why is it that a lot of the people who think everyone is too easily offended these days act like you just insulted their mother by saying "Happy Holidays" instead of "Merry Christmas"?
←Rate | 12-18-2015 15:23 Comments (0)  

   messageicon ♪ ♩♩ ♬ On the 12th Day of Christmas my Facebook gave to me, 12 dudes I'm blocking, 11 friends just watching, 10 corny topics, 9 busted barbies, 8 friends complaining, 7 stalkers stalking, 6 party invites, Fiiiiiiiiiiiiive Drama Queeeensssss,
←Rate | 12-18-2015 12:12 Comments (0)  

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