nfl OR football OR superbowl Funny Status Messages

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   messageicon A woman who can make her man accompany her to the mall for shopping when there is a football match on TV probably don't give blow jobs either.
←Rate | 11-26-2012 13:03 Comments (0)  

   messageicon My favorite thing about Basketball is when it's Football.
←Rate | 11-25-2012 17:17 by snotty Comments (0)  

   messageicon In retaliation for the genocide of their people the Indians today magnificently beat the Cowboys in a game of football! All is even!
←Rate | 11-22-2012 21:20 by @daddybullfrog1 Comments (0)  

   messageicon I get tired of all the drama of family getting mad and running out the door every Thanksgiving! I believe a man is allowed to watch football naked in his own house!
←Rate | 11-22-2012 18:00 by Comments (0)  

   messageicon I am confused did Roethlisberger hurt his arm playing football or rap!ng somebody?
←Rate | 11-18-2012 20:27 Comments (0)  

   messageicon When my girlfriend's football team wins it makes her horny, so I just keep replaying the one time they did. I'm not stupid.
←Rate | 11-14-2012 13:50 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Judging by the empty seats at Dolphin's games, football is doomed in Miami. Time to realize it's soccer and thug roundball city down there. Will the last American to leave Miami please bring the goalposts?
←Rate | 11-14-2012 09:40 by Boo Hiss! Comments (0)  

   messageicon Listening to Obama talk about the economy is like listening to a chick talk about football.
←Rate | 11-13-2012 16:38 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  

   messageicon "I wanted to watch football on NBC but this figure skating they're showing is cool too". --said no one ever
←Rate | 11-12-2012 06:23 by flinnie Comments (0)  

   messageicon 9 year old girl in boys football league with 232 carries, ran for 1,911 yards, 35 tds, and 65 tackles?! WTF?! Young lady is an inspiration!!! Never let society limit your dreams!!!
←Rate | 11-08-2012 18:01 Comments (1)  

   messageicon David Beckham does some amazing football tricks.. I hear that he managed to hit Katherine Jenkins chin with two balls.
←Rate | 11-06-2012 23:15 Comments (0)  

   messageicon "Please scream as loud as you possibly can," says the dentist to his patient. "Why should I do that?" "The waiting room's full and the football game's on in ten minutes."
←Rate | 10-25-2012 14:28 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  

   messageicon MY Fantasy Football thing is about the Cheerleaders.
←Rate | 10-21-2012 10:12 by Mickey Comments (0)  

   messageicon Dear fucktards at baseball games in football team gear. It doesn't count; you look like you're lost…
←Rate | 10-13-2012 10:32 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Thursday Night Football on the same time during the Vice Presidential debate....well played NFL, well played.
←Rate | 10-11-2012 21:58 Comments (0)  

   messageicon watches Sunday football with you all day... Wife that girl.
←Rate | 10-07-2012 22:06 by BEGO Comments (0)  

   messageicon Drank like 3 Four Lokos and some hand sanitizer last night, blacked out and apparently officiated a Monday Night Football game.
←Rate | 09-26-2012 04:24 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  

   messageicon I just got a call from the NFL office...they must have gotten wind of that 1 flag football game I ref'd in 2002
←Rate | 09-25-2012 21:26 by xi0n Comments (0)  

   messageicon I suggest the Jets put Tim Tebow at cornerback to replace Darrell Revis. Nobody can keep the football away from receivers like he can.
←Rate | 09-24-2012 16:46 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Ladies.. Yall had 7 months to get mentally prepared for Football Season. We dealt with yall Loser Wives shows all year!
←Rate | 09-21-2012 01:21 by fadolo Comments (0)  

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