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English teachers on Facebook must feel the same hopelessness as dentists do when they're at a candy shop
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12-09-2017 04:28
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You bring everyone a lot of joy, when you leave the room.
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12-18-2017 10:54
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Aliens probably lock their doors when they ride past earth.
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11-13-2018 14:11
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Welcome to your 40s. Drugs are no longer just for fun, they’re medicine now
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12-09-2018 10:22
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Every restaurant in the world is packed on mothers day but they want us to BBQ on fathers day.
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05-31-2018 18:06
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My insurance company said if my tent is stolen while I'm camping, I won't be covered.
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06-28-2018 11:26
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A friend of mine asked what it's like to raise a small toddler so I coughed directly in his mouth
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12-13-2017 09:50
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For once I’d like to get kicked INTO a bar
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11-22-2017 02:45 by
Kisstopher707
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A trail of clothes leading to my bedroom means that I dropped them on the way from the dryer. That's all.
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12-08-2017 11:39
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If you're in a relationship. I don't know why you feel the need to upload 10 selfies a day. Look at your boyfriend instead of a camera
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12-16-2017 06:14
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I went to the doctor because I couldn’t stop listening to Tom Jones. He told me it’s not unusual
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01-07-2018 14:37 by
MWC
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Women who say the quickest way to a man's heart is through his stomach hasn't seen his browser history
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02-08-2018 03:07
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This is Assumption Club. I think we all know why we are here.
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03-06-2018 12:34
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This dentist just told me I need a crown, and it's a relief to finally start getting some recognition around here.
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03-08-2018 22:26
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It is in everyone’s best interest to just keep scrolling
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03-13-2018 02:57
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Happier than a Goth Girl being carried off by a flock of ravens.
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03-13-2018 03:05
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remember the time you confused a life lesson for a soulmate?
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03-30-2018 14:53
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That prince in Sleeping Beauty doesn't get enough credit for kissing someone who hadn't brushed her teeth in forever
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04-13-2018 05:08
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Sometimes I think I need to be in a mental institution, then I look around and think that maybe I already am.
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11-29-2018 10:18
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An easy way to tell people you don't like them is to send them a Xmas card with glitter on it.
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12-18-2018 21:51
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