love Funny Status Messages

   Don't get me wrong, I love football just as much as the next guy but if she want's to do it during game time, football is the last thing on my mind.

   Spending quality time with the people that really matter reminds me of who I am and recharges my love, hope and drive. I'm forever grateful.

   I love looking up at a guy when I'm giving him head. Once we lock eyes, and I smile, I own your ass.

   Hold still, I'm trying to make you fall in love with me.

   I love when my boss catches me actually doing work.

   All this restraining order means is that I love you too much.

   I love cats! They taste just like chicken

   I had mice in my kitchen til I replaced mouse traps with tiny notes that said,"I'll love you forever". They left me for my neighbor.

   I love it when she's hot for me, or just hot for someone and I happen to be there.

   You can love your country without having to love your government.

   I love the stick figure family's on your car windows they let me know how many garbage bags to bring to the murder.

   I love when my husband plays terrorist, he knocks down my walls

   I love it when a girl tell me she is not a slut and then 2-hours latter I've got her feet behind her ears while screaming my name.

   I love being in that mood where everything is hilarious!

   I texted my girlfriend "I love you" and she texted back "I love you more. When I went to respond I made a typo and sent "I love you moist"....I figured why correct it, it's true too.

   I would hurt the people that I love for a taco right now.

   Oh for god sake, just fall in love with me already so I can stop acting normal.

   I really love my new tattoo. "No pain, no g"

   love The beauty of vodka is that it looks like water. The beauty of the workplace is that water bottles are allowed

   How to win his love: 1. hold your own hair. 2. tell him he's big. 3. make him laugh at you. 4. be quiet.