Mom or Mother Funny Status Messages



Sort:  Recent   |   Oldest   |   Rating
Filter On | Filter Off | No Trump


Search Messages:
[Clear]

Search results for status messages containing 'Mom or Mother': View All Messages
Page: 6 of 30

   messageicon I saw six men kicking and punching the mother-in-law. My neighbour said 'Are you going to help?' I said 'No, six should be enough.
←Rate | 01-25-2011 17:35 by Dopey420 Comments (0)  


   messageicon filled out an application that said, "In Case Of Emergency Notify". I wrote "Doctor"... What's my mother going to do?
←Rate | 06-08-2010 13:31 by @seddy90 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Your mother sat on my glasses and broke them, I guess it's partially my fault, I should of took them off my face first.
←Rate | 04-24-2011 16:45 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why do meteorologists try and educate me on the workings of mother nature?  Dude, just tell me pants or shorts tomorrow...
←Rate | 09-09-2011 01:57 by Mike M Comments (0)  


   messageicon Getting snubbed by the left turn arrow at an intersection after waiting your turn is annoying. Getting skipped twice? I will murder you, light! But a third time?! Clearly a valid legal defense for blowing right through that mother f*cker.
←Rate | 09-03-2010 05:20 Comments (0)  


   messageicon have you ever noticed that if you rearranged the letters in mother in law, they come out to Woman Hitler?
←Rate | 06-20-2009 06:38 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Hey status messages auto correct, stop tampering with my swear words, you mother forklift.
←Rate | 11-20-2011 23:33 Comments (0)  


   messageicon My mother + my father - condom = COOLEST PERSON ALIVE! :-).
←Rate | 08-17-2011 22:51 Comments (0)  


   messageicon A little boy examines his privates while in the bath. "Mommy, are these my brains?" His mother says, "Not yet."
←Rate | 09-25-2010 21:20 by badd status Comments (0)  


   messageicon Whenever I fill out an application, in the part that says "If an emergency, notify:" I put "DOCTOR". What's my mother going to do?
←Rate | 12-12-2009 12:25 by bcj Comments (0)  


   messageicon Some of you I'd like to take under my wing like a mother hen. Others of you I'd like to trap between my thighs like the Cougar that I am.
←Rate | 07-26-2012 10:13 Comments (0)  


   messageicon An Amber Alert has been issued for a tall, African American 26 yr. old who goes by the name of LeBron James. He keeps disappearing for the 4th quarter of the NBA Final games. If seen, please call his mother, Gloria, or her boyfriend, Delonte.
←Rate | 06-08-2011 07:23 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I saw six men kicking and punching the mother-in-law. My neighbour said 'Are you going to help?' I said 'No, Six should be enoug
←Rate | 02-02-2010 21:35 Comments (0)  


   messageicon A blizzard in January, and a tornado in February. I didn't realize how bi polar mother nature really is.
←Rate | 02-28-2011 00:40 by Will Comments (0)  


   messageicon The Mother Of All storms (Frankenstorm) is heading toward New York City... Trump better get out the hairspray.
←Rate | 10-28-2012 16:01 by BreannaSmith Comments (1)  


   messageicon Well I guess Caitlyn Jenner missed out on both Mother and Father's Day this year....
←Rate | 06-21-2015 19:28 by wiserone Comments (0)  


   messageicon My mother always told me to never quit something I'm good at. So here is to her for making me realize that i'm good at being drunk!
←Rate | 03-28-2012 21:02 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon "FREEZE! NOBODY MOVE!" - Mother Nature
←Rate | 01-07-2014 18:18 by SColeman Comments (0)  


   messageicon a single father of about 4 million kids swimming around fighting to make it to their mother's egg
←Rate | 06-20-2010 23:01 by Danmanz Comments (0)  


   messageicon In Mother Russia, we don't shoot for the stars, the stars shoot for us
←Rate | 02-16-2013 19:28 by Yaj Comments (0)  



[Search Results] [View All Messages]
Submit your own funny facebook status message here:
Name:
Status Message:

... characters left