Funny Status Messages and Tweets

Funny Facebook Status Messages or Whatsapp updates and funny tweets for Twitter.

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   messageicon If love is a game..where can I buy the multiplayer-version?
←Rate | 01-30-2010 14:43 by Kobrah Comments (0)  

   messageicon A friend of mine once commented that huamns are the only species to go out of our way to obtain milk after we've been weaned, I replied that we were the only species with cookies.
←Rate | 01-30-2010 14:38 by Kobrah Comments (0)  

   messageicon I love your approach. Now let's see about your departure.
←Rate | 01-30-2010 14:23 by Lemonpillow Comments (0)  

   messageicon annoyed that these guys like Clooney, Cruise, and DeNiro are all picking me as their celebrity look-alike. Get a life losers.
←Rate | 01-30-2010 14:16 by jake Comments (0)  

   messageicon I hate being bi-polar. It's awesome.
←Rate | 01-30-2010 14:14 Comments (0)  

   messageicon If you enter this world knowing you are loved and you leave this world knowing the same, then everything that happens in between can be dealt with.
←Rate | 01-30-2010 13:55 by mdc Comments (0)  

   messageicon Would if he could: Change his relationship status to "Pimpin'...and it's complicated"
←Rate | 01-30-2010 13:20 Comments (0)  

   messageicon She's somewhat of a mixture between a chickenhead and a swallow
←Rate | 01-30-2010 13:17 Comments (0)  

   messageicon thinks that a decapitated´╗┐ Frog looks hotter than the Jonas Brothers
←Rate | 01-30-2010 13:15 by DOESITMATTER Comments (0)  

   messageicon welcome to britain, where men are men and women are slags!
←Rate | 01-30-2010 12:45 Comments (0)  

   messageicon We need Facebook for Dummies Asap..Because Some OF Yall Say the Dumbest Shi...
←Rate | 01-30-2010 12:45 by jay Comments (0)  

   messageicon We need Facebook Dummies Asap..Because Some OF Yall Say the Dumbest Shi...
←Rate | 01-30-2010 12:44 by jay Comments (0)  

   messageicon - Why pay for a comedian, when you can watch liverpool play football
←Rate | 01-30-2010 10:42 by Kee Comments (0)  

   messageicon reminding everyone to Not eat the yellow snow
←Rate | 01-30-2010 09:24 Comments (0)  

   messageicon loves you as much as a fat kid loves cake.
←Rate | 01-30-2010 08:49 Comments (0)  

   messageicon the "Pull my finger" joke stinks.
←Rate | 01-30-2010 08:21 Comments (0)  

   messageicon so poor, she can't even afford to window shop.
←Rate | 01-30-2010 05:36 by lemonpillow Comments (0)  

   messageicon I believe in taking the bull by the horns. Then I believe in steering it in the direction of whoever is bugging me.
←Rate | 01-30-2010 05:33 by lemonpillow Comments (0)  

   messageicon If you drink, dont drive. If you drive, dont speed. If you speed, dont get caught. If dont you get caught, dont end up in jail. If you end up in jail..... Dont drop the soap.
←Rate | 01-30-2010 04:02 by SouthTroy4 Comments (0)  

   messageicon Snow on da ground.... Snow on da ground... drivin' like a fool when there's snow on da ground....look at ya now... car spinning 'round.... drivin' like a fool when there's snow on da ground...
←Rate | 01-29-2010 23:37 Comments (0)  

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