Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
Page: 4902 of 6370
Pharmacist to Customer: To buy anti-depression pills, Sir you need a proper prescription.. Simply showing a pic of your wife is not enough.
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05-09-2011 04:12
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The 1st testicular guard was used in Cricket in 1874 & the 1st helmet was used in 1974. It took 100y to realize the brain is also important
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05-09-2011 04:11
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learned a lot about relationships from Super Mario Bros..sometimes, You have to pound a few Dragons to get to the Princess
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05-09-2011 04:04 by Danny
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In the 90's we had Clinton in office. We also had Bob Hope and Johnny Cash. Now we have Obama in office and we have no hope and no cash.
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05-09-2011 04:04
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Jell-O: Doubling the global demand for supply of Vodka since 1923
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05-09-2011 03:32 by Gil
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I just thought of a quick way to spot a woman who is having that time of the month attitude problem! I call it the "Eye Pad!"
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05-09-2011 02:52 by Kelso
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Better get a bigger spatula before you try flipping that on me!
That Awkward Moment When You Look Outside Your Window And Someones' Looking At You...
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05-09-2011 01:04 by Joshin
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FaceBook account for sale....Friends included!
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05-09-2011 00:42 by punkie
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My mother taught me about RECEIVING. “You are going to get it when you get home!”
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05-09-2011 00:05 by BEGO
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Two plus two is five given very large quantities of two.
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05-08-2011 23:58 by TZ
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My mother taught me about JUSTICE. “One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you”.
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05-08-2011 23:48 by BEGO
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it "Pets Mart"? Or is it "Pet Smart"?
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05-08-2011 23:27
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Born Free and Taxed to death!
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05-08-2011 23:25
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If your going to ask a girl out, make sure you know you'll treat her right. I see some guys treat their Girls like garbage. It's a disgrace. Have some respect!
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05-08-2011 23:17
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If evolution was true, mothers would have more than two hands.
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05-08-2011 22:56 by BEGO
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A man loves his sweetheart the most, his wife the best, but his mother the longest.
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05-08-2011 22:54 by BEGO
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Being a full-time mother is one of the highest salaried jobs… since the payment is pure love.
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05-08-2011 22:53 by BEGO
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NO , people should stop arguing about ps3 and. Xbox 360 , because we all know the BEST system is, was and always will be the Atari 2600.
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05-08-2011 22:48
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this where you want to be when Jesus comes back?
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05-08-2011 22:48
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