Mom or Mother Funny Status Messages

   Ted Mosby, in the year 2030, told the story of how he met his children’s mother and HE NEVER MENTIONED THE CORONAVIRUS ONCE

   am I the only person watching Fuller House waiting for Bob Saget to tell the daughters how he met their mother?

   No, but I do kiss YOUR mother with this mouth.

   Little Johnny wrote to Santa, "I want a baby brother for christmas." Santa wrote back' "Send me your Mother. '

   My mother sent me a private message on fb, telling me that I shouldn't post things that some people might find offensive. after much soul searching I had to do the right thing, so I unfriended her !

   My mother taught me about RECEIVING. “You are going to get it when you get home!”

   When my son was a teen and bragged how he came out of his mother, I reminded him that he came out of me first.

   I haven't spoken to my mother-in-law for eighteen months. I don't like to interrupt her.

   Which sexual position produces the ugliest children? Ask your Mother

   pizza will never tell you to apologize to your mother in law

   trading his mother-in-law for a stud service and willing to add cash

   Pope declares Mother Teresa a saint. Kanye West sues the Catholic Church for copyright infringement.

   I've have met everyone's mother today via Facebook

   My mother talks into the phone like a combat soldier calling in air support. Happy Mother's Day!!!

   Me: I need to ask you a serious question. GF: OK! First, let me get my mother, sister, BFF and college roommate on speakerphone!! Me: OK, why does a wool sweater shrink when you wash it but sheep don't shrink when it rains??

   "Honolulu - it's got everything. Sand for the children, sun for the wife, sharks for the wife's mother."

   i walked past my mother-in-law's house today that was on fire. I spotted her screaming from the top window, "SAVE ME, SAVE ME!!!" ...So I did! ...as my new screensaver.

   Mother-in-law: A woman who destroys her son-in-laws peace of mind by giving him a piece of hers.

   still looking for his future mother-in-law with only one very nice and sexy daugther

   Just saw Bigfoot!! Oh wait, its just the mother in law.