love Funny Status Messages

   I hate liars, but I love a good bedtime story.

   Make love, not war.-Hell, do both GET MARRIED!

   just wanted to tell the weekend that I love you and I will be back, I will not let the weekdays take me away from you.

   The number one lie in the whole world is...i swear I will love you forever..

   My Wife said the other day "Do you still love me now that I'm getting old and fat?". Apparently "you're not old" was an inppropriate response.

   BREAKING NEWS: California becomes first state to ban plastic bags...People who love picking up dog crap with their bare hands rejoice.

   Alright! Drunk me from last night made hungover me some epic sandwiches for lunch today. Man, I love that guy!" :)

   I love how the ninja turtles wear masks. Way to hide your identity, its not like your a giant turtle or anything.

   U love someone and you marry someone else. The one you marry becomes ur wife and the one you love becomes the password of your email

   Dear men who are smart and hot and madly in love with me: Please start existing.

   Happy 4th of July my American friends. We got you a gift. His name is Justin Bieber. Keep him!! Love Canada.

   If you can't celebrate Valentine's Day with someone you love, celebrate it with alcohol and pizza.

   Live,Laugh, Love if that doesn't work- Raise, Aim and Fire..

   How to impress a woman: kiss, hug, compliment, love, tease, protect, listen, support. How to impress a man: Show up NAKED with BEER!!!

   To this day it still upsets me that all of those times that Forest Gump was separated from his true love, he never ONCE thought to pick up a phone and dial 867-5309.......

   I love doggie style as much as the next guy, but sometimes she's just too pretty to do from behind.

   You find love when you're not looking for it, and you can't find it when you really want to. It's sh!t like this that makes me drink.

   Dear people who think Romeo and Juliet was a romantic love story.... It was a relationship between a 13 yr old and 17 yr old that lasted 3 days and resulted in 6 deaths.... Sincerely, Everyone that has actually read the story!

   When I finally meet the love of my life, I hope he appreciates all the time I spent following him and hiding in his bushes.

   I love it when I read a post and I think ive read the page but its just some idiot reposting a post from a few pages back.