Exercise Funny Status Messages

   Some of my friends exercise every day. Meanwhile, I’m watching a show I don’t like because the remote fell in the floor.

   If swimming is good exercise, then explain whales.

   Does rocking a vending machine count as exercise?

   Me: I am surprised at how winded I am by this exercise!! Personal Trainer: This was the tour of the gym.

   I want to lose weight, but I don't want to get caught up in one of those "Eat right and exercise" scams

   I've started an exercise program. I do 20 sit-ups each morning. That may not sound like a lot, but you can only hit that snooze button so many times.

   I've been avoiding exercise for a long time now. You might say I'm in the Fitness Protection Program.

   Claiming a product promotes "Weight Loss" when combined with diet and exercise is like claiming that it grants wishes when used with a leprechaun.

   EXERCISE?? Shoot, I thought you said EXTRA PIES!!!

   Many people have told me that waking up at 5 in the morning to exercise makes you feel great..... But I think lying in bed for another 2 hours feels better. Just sayin'....

   They say that sex is the best form of exercise. Now, correct me if I'm wrong, but 2 minutes and 15 seconds once every 3 months ain't going to shift your beer belly is it.

   I'm thinking about buying an exercise bike, my treadmill works fine for laying my pants on, but it won't accommodate hanging shirts on hangers.

   I would exercise, but then all the sprinkles would fall off my cupcake.

   I confine my exercise to jumping to conclusions, stretching the truth and pushing my luck.

   omg I just found out I'm allergic to exercise...at first I get all flushed, then I break out in a sweat, my heart starts pounding really fast, then I cant breath........i wont be doing that again!

   I'm opening a gym called Resolutions. It has exercise equipment for the first 2 weeks of each year, then becomes a bar for the remaining 50

   loves infomercials, but claiming that a product promotes weight loss when combined with diet and exercise is like claiming it grants wishes when used with a leprechaun.

   Everybody says waking up at 5 in the morning to exercise makes you feel great but I think lying in bed for another 2 hours feels better

   I want to lose weight, but I don't want to get caught up in one of those "Eat right and exercise" scams.

   How many exercise/workout videos does a person have to buy before seeing results?