life Funny Status Messages
Search Messages:
Search results for status messages containing 'life': View All Messages
Page: 88 of 189
Life is too short to be a basketball player 
People who cry like a baby over repeated jokes. Life is short - stop sulking.
Without women, life would be a pain in the ass. If you don't get this, you're too young to be on Facebook.
There's a point in life when you get tired of chasing everyone and trying to fix everything, but it's not giving up, it's realizing that you don't need certain people and their crap.
Flirting is a way of life, the moment you stop is when you're dead ... then your spouse cleans the gun and places it in your hand.
After a long weekend without your phone, you learn what's really important in life. Your phone.
You know that scene in 8 Mile where Eminem disses himself so the other guy has nothing to rap about? That's basically my only plan in life.
Sometimes I wish my life was more like a comedy and less like a drama
You never realise how boring life is until someone asks you what you like to do for fun.
Just saw a doctor eating an apple. My whole life is a lie.
Learned a lesson from my dog tonight.................No matter what life brings you, kick some grass over that sh1t and move on.
There would be no limits to what a man could achieve... if he were to apply the same level of focus, persistence and dedication to his daily life... that he does when drunk and trying to convince a hot lesbian to sleep with him...
On the battlefield of life, my weapon of choice is intelligence.
Single life might be lonely, but at least I'm always with my favorite person
I wish there was a rewind button in life.
My pre-nup will indicate that I'm allowed to unplug her life support system should my phone need charging....
Life is full of rejection. Even my credit card has been denied
The first person who offers to tell you about the facts of life usually doesn't have a clue...
My pre-nup will indicate that I'm allowed to unplug your life support system should my phone need charging.
The most humbling, terrifying, self-reflective moment in a man's life is when he realizes his beautiful daughter is attached to a v@gina. [Search Results] [View All Messages]
