love Funny Status Messages

   I love a good hardy dump in the morning time....I can't stand a tiny turd tease...makes me feel like an underachiever

   Love comes from the brain; an erecti0n comes from the heart.

   Oh, you love your boyfriend? Please, go ahead and saturate my Facebook news feed with your feelings.

   I'd love to ram a big black dild0 up John Terry's ass.

   I love catching up with friends that I haven't seen for a while so that we can all sit around together doing shyt on our phones.

   I'm currently killing a twelve pack, and every squirrel within fifty yards of my porch. Love me some Saturdays.

   Tell someone you love them today, because life is short. But shout it at them in German, because life is also terrifying and confusing.

   Tell someone you love them today, because life is short. But SHOUT it at them in German, because life is also terrifying and confusing

   I've finally found someone I can love - a good, clean love... without utensils.

   I sent that b!tch a smiley face. B!tches LOVE smiley faces

   I love it when Facebook flirting turns into tearing each other's clothes off and passionate sex.

   "Will you love me forever?" She asked. "Of course." I replied, lying beside her...

   When I'm bored late at night, I text random numbers saying: “You should really clean under your bed, it's filthy down here. PS: I love you."

   Teacher Johnny: Use the word HARASSMENT in a Sentence... Johnny: I was in Love with a girl and.. Her-ass-meant a lot to me

   If you LOVE something, set it free.. If it comes back to you,,,,you love a boomerang

   Fellas; Don't just rush to hit it. Take time to know her, then you'll know how to love her emotionally and physically.

   My Mom texted me, "What does IDK, LY, and TTYL mean?" I answered, "I don't know, love you, and talk to you later." She said, "Ok I'll ask your sisters."

   I love finding money in my pockets after a night of drinking. It's like a gift to sober me…from drunk me.

   Love doesn't ask why, it ask "When and where?"

   Y.O.L.O You Obviously Love Oreos