snow OR flurries OR winter Funny Status Messages

   This weekend, I forgot to set the thermostat ahead on my clock,,,, Mine's still set for winter...

   It's official I'm suing my job for refusing to recognize my religion of being a bear and denying me my beliefs of winter hibernation.

   Dear Car driving 40mph on the highway this morning. It's only a 1/4“ of snow plus you have a "Jesus Fish" on your bumper. You'll be just fine.

   Ladies….there is a difference between fake tanning and changing your entire ethnicity during the winter months.

   Everyday I'm shoveling. - Winter 2014

   There are 15 year olds skating in the Olympics and I can’t even walk down my driveway in winter

   Ok mother nature we beat the snow record now there's no need to run the score up!

   I'm not sure I buy that, "An apple a day" expression any more. As a matter of fact, I'm completely convinced apples are bad news. Just look at Eve, Snow White, or any pig at a Hawaiian Luau.

   Snow is herpes of the weather

   The great thing about waking up to 3 feet of snow is it gives me a legit excuse to skip my usual 5:30am 20K run.

   I know how the North won the Civil War - They used snow machines....

   All this slippery ice and snow is making this texting while driving a real challenge...

   I can't wait for all the life long residents in NY to see snow for the first time.

   The winter days I have to open the car doors with crowbar is the best.

   Personally, I think it's bull that Russia didn't host the Winter Olympics in Chernobyl

   Most people don't know this, but the North only won the Civil War because the South got half an inch of snow and they lost their damn minds

   Joe Namath's coat saw it's shadow... 6 more weeks of winter.

   I think Old Man Winter & Mother Nature need to have a few drinks and make a little Spring.

   I blame this winter weather on Idina Menzel.....

   So Pete saw his shadow today...that means 6 more feet of winter right???