love Funny Status Messages

   wow I love how your face is 5 shades darker than your neck

   what did Micahel Jackson Love about twenty five year olds........there was 20 of em

   Love is like hearing your favorite song for the first time. Then listening to it over and over again till you hate that song.

   Wish there were more love songs about naps and liqour.

   When I squirt on you, consider yourself baptized in my love

   On Monday, Chipotle will begin selling tofu burritos in the New York area. So if you love burritos, and you love tofu . . . you probably don’t exist.

   Tell her you'll change. B*tches love change. Just ask Obama.

   Buy her a time machine, because women love bringing up the past.

   I love those people who can make me laugh during those moments when I feel like I can’t even smile.

   Some call it love, I call it vodka.

   I would love to put out a comic labeled "For Mature Readers" that is just a heartfelt meditation on aging and mortality.

   I love You Tube. You can look up everthing. It's Google the Movie musical

   I love it how doctors show you pictures of smoker's ugly lungs and non smokers healthy lungs when technically both sets of lungs came from DEAD PEOPLE.

   Bring me pizza and beer and me love you long time.

   The big movies right now in theaters are Robocop, Endless Love, and About Last Night. I feel like it's the end of the 80s all over again.

   The less you know about someone, the easier it is to love them.

   Man I love watching women's curling in the Olympics. It's the only time I get to drink beer while cheering on women sweeping and no one slaps me.

   Valentine Day weekend is over. I think Helen Keller plays the role of cupid in my love life.

   Today I'm wearing my new underwear, On the front it reads "I would do anything for love" and the back says "But I wont do that"...

   Happy Valentine's Day to my right hand. I love you more than the left!