snow OR flurries OR winter Funny Status Messages

   Relationships are a winter sport..

   My wife wants me to go outside to put away the picnic table and umbrella away for the winter. How can she expect me to reach these things from the couch?...it's impossible. She just does not understand.

   not sure what is going on today but I think I released enough "natural gas" to supply my furnace for the winter...

   Snow in the forecast and the TV weather gal said she was expecting 8 inches tonight. I thought to myself, 'fat chance,' with a face like that!

   I'm pretty sure all of the 7 dwarfs were named after a stage of Snow White's heroin addiction.

   Some girls say that they need a boyfriend to keep them warm in the winter. I just bought a coat

   Why I love winter: 1. Christmas morning with my kids 2. Snow 3. My wife keeps her clothes on during sex. 4. Liquor in my car stays cold

   When I think about snow, it's a lot like thinking about sex. I want to ride it, bask in its glory, & go down on it.

   Wow...Im sittin at work watchin the snow fall... Its friggin October! Mother Nature must of finally hit menopause.. That fridgid b!tch made it snow!! Bring fall back!!!

   yes winter is here .....let the relationships begin!!!

   starin at a fluorescent light Above him watchin the dust bunny fall like snow.

   Snow white lived with all those men & didn't once do any "favors" to get out of housework? Now THAT's a fairy tale.

   Science Schmience. I think they've got it backwards. Birds don't fly south for the winter, they fly north for the summer. Nyah!

   Me? Behave? Seriously... As a child I saw Tarzan strolling naked. Cinderella arrived home after midnight. Pinocchio told lies. Aladdin was a thief. Batman drove over 200 miles an hour. Snow White lived in a house with 7 men. It's not my fault!

   two young boys are lying in a snow bank outside of church with their pants down. when asked what they were doing they said "father likes a couple cold ones before mass begins"

   Drinking and driving is twice the fun in the snow

   You expect kids to behave when tarzan lives half naked, cinderella comes home midnight, Pinocchio lies all the time, Aladdin is king of thieves, Batman drives at 200mph, sleeping Beauty is lazy & snow white lives with 7 guys?

   Why don't they air "Shark week" in the winter when we all don't care about swimming?

   I'm watching for anyone complaining about the heat. I will copy your post and save it for winter. Then I WILL paste it to your profile with WHO IS HOT NOW when you are buried snow. OH you know who you are!

   This year I broke ties with Winter, She was pretty mad and told Summer about me. So our relationship has benn stormy and a little chilly at times.