jdirt Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon When I was a kid people who wore there hat crooked, pants half off, and shoes untied rode the short bus
←Rate | 08-09-2011 16:12 by jdirt Comments (0)  


   messageicon Damn white cars that look like cop cars! I just chugged my beer super fast for nothing
←Rate | 07-06-2011 13:29 by jdirt Comments (0)  


   messageicon Doing the old....how many woman have I slept with count....God I hate fractions
←Rate | 07-06-2011 13:29 by jdirt Comments (0)  


   messageicon There are three very important things you can always give but still keep at the same time...Your word, a smile and your heart
←Rate | 08-08-2011 22:46 by jdirt Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't get the toilet seat issue that woman have. I won't put my naked butt on anything without looking at it first. Apparently some woman ar not so discriminating
←Rate | 07-06-2011 13:30 by jdirt Comments (0)  


   messageicon If you cant dazzle them with your brilliance, baffle them with your bull$hit. -Abraham Lincoln
←Rate | 07-06-2011 13:33 by jdirt Comments (2)  


   messageicon Her legs are like the waffle house.. Open 24/7 but people only eat there when they're drunk
←Rate | 08-03-2011 08:41 by jdirt Comments (0)  


   messageicon Say this fast- { I, 1, 2, 1/2, 6} *Like* if you get it
←Rate | 07-31-2011 23:51 by jdirt Comments (1)  


   messageicon Tough times never last but tough people do
←Rate | 07-06-2011 13:59 by jdirt Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm multi-talented, I can talk and piss you off at the same time
←Rate | 08-10-2011 12:27 by jdirt Comments (0)  


   messageicon if you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it
←Rate | 08-10-2011 10:58 by jdirt Comments (0)  


   messageicon She goes down faster than power windows
←Rate | 08-03-2011 08:38 by jdirt Comments (0)  


   messageicon I was at the red light beside a car load of mexicans when a semi ran over top them. I thought, dang that could've been me. So I got my CDL's
←Rate | 08-05-2011 11:07 by jdirt Comments (0)  


   messageicon You may be an open book but I'm a bit more complicated than that. The inner machinations of my mind are an enigma
←Rate | 07-06-2011 14:04 by jdirt Comments (0)  


   messageicon The best things in life aren't free, they're 16 bucks a case and either 60 bucks at the cat house or the cost of room and board at home.
←Rate | 07-31-2011 16:41 by jdirt Comments (0)  


   messageicon Drinking and driving is twice the fun in the snow
←Rate | 08-09-2011 16:13 by jdirt Comments (0)  


   messageicon You may be an open book but I'm a bit more complicated than that. The inner macanations of my mind are an enigma
←Rate | 07-06-2011 13:34 by jdirt Comments (0)  

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