Funny Status Messages and Tweets

   Instead of all this nonsence with an hour here or there or mess around with the whole leap years crap. We should accumulate the time for an extra day on the weekend!.

   reminding you that you need to turn your clocks back this weekend, i'm going to turn mine back to when I was 25.

   Hun, your jerk boyfriend is like a bottle of sour milk in the fridge. You don't keep going back and tasting the milk to see if it's better; why do you think that if you give him enough chances, he'll magically become a nice guy?

   need to finish my assignments fast before my brains figure out I am doing something productive....

   Hopeless you say !!! Nah, don't give up, some people live an entire life on hope....and guess what ?? They living fine.... :)

   If I am ever put on life support, pull the plug, wait 30 seconds and plug it back in. See if that works

   So if I post a status on Facebook between 1:01am and 1:59am tomorrow does it disappear at 2:00am?

   a strong supporter of gay rights but he thinks we should also strongly support gay lefts because the two go hand-in-hand.

   considering switching his Facebook account to Spanish language settings so that he can have a "me gusta" button.

   embarrassed himself at a funeral today - the shop didn't have any condolence cards left so he just bought a "Hope You'll Be Happy In Your New Home!" one instead.

   Please Don't write on my wall, I just painted it yesterday. Thanks.

   thinking about 2012 and what the changes could be that the Mayans predicted. Studying a crop circles and the Sumerian creation text that seemingly Christianity borrowed. So many fascinating things to think about.

   You think of it as an extra hour of sleep..... I think of it as 6 less taps on the snooze button.

   You think of it as an extra hour of sleep. I think of it was an extra hour of dreaming and keeping reality at bay.

   if a girl cheats on her bf tonight, then sets back her clock, it won't count because your reliving that hour w daylight savings and the universe cancels it out

   this chick I was talking to told me on facebook to stop calling/texting her because she lost her phone. Right under her post was "sent from facebook for iPhone.

   The Greek invented lovemaking, but the Italians introduced it to the women

   screaming obscenities at my computer because my essay is due tomorrow and it just crashed.  My name is X, and Windows 7 was my idea.

   aim for the moon, if you miss youll be among the stars"..then pressure & lack of o2 will make your as@hole explode out of your nostrils.

   Today, I was rejected by a girl when she told me she is not ready to date. We met on a dating website