Chris Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Celebrate Valentines Day responsibly, or you'll be celebrating Thanksgiving in a maternity ward
←Rate | 02-14-2012 16:14 by chris Comments (0)  


   messageicon Life was much simpler when Apple and Blackberry were just fruits.
←Rate | 02-11-2010 05:39 by chris Comments (0)  


   messageicon expecting life to treat you fairly because you're a good person is like expecting the bull not to charge at you because you're a vegetarian.
←Rate | 11-25-2010 14:14 by Chris Comments (0)  


   messageicon Life would be more simple if the person who named the orange an orange would have named more things!
←Rate | 10-19-2011 16:23 by Chris Comments (0)  


   messageicon If it wasn't for the fact that I had to pee, I'd never get out of bed
←Rate | 09-30-2010 14:55 by chris Comments (0)  


   messageicon id much rather have morning wood than morning sickness
←Rate | 12-13-2011 00:09 by chris Comments (0)  


   messageicon is watching "according to Jim"...god definatly took the wrong Belushi
←Rate | 08-02-2010 19:14 by chris Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm still not entirely sure what instagram is
←Rate | 07-06-2012 00:22 by chris Comments (0)  


   messageicon I like to go to the store, ask for help, get real close to the employee and whisper "Where is your lice medicine" just for the reaction
←Rate | 09-22-2011 21:12 by Chris Comments (0)  


   messageicon wants to remind everyone it's not the size of the boat... Or the motion of the ocean, but the whether the boat is able to stay in port until all passangers have gotten off!!!
←Rate | 10-21-2009 16:08 by Chris Comments (0)  


   messageicon Life seemed more interesting when everyone owned a flask.
←Rate | 02-21-2012 16:54 by chris Comments (0)  


   messageicon looking back those D.A.R.E classes were really a waste of time
←Rate | 11-29-2010 16:35 by chris Comments (0)  


   messageicon ok its almost March....all the people that joined my gym in January for their new years resolution can stop now, I'm tired of waiting to use machines
←Rate | 02-24-2012 17:18 by Chris Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't trust girls with mustaches.
←Rate | 08-13-2010 09:13 by Chris Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dude instead of all these credit card companies sending me all these applications they should donate the paper to schools or something!
←Rate | 12-15-2010 11:34 by chris Comments (0)  


   messageicon reading a book....yea I know I was shocked too
←Rate | 04-29-2010 02:13 by chris Comments (0)  


   messageicon Next person that talks politics with me I'm kicking in the crotch. I don't care if they elect a pineapple into office. It's all one big game anyway.
←Rate | 09-06-2012 04:02 by chris Comments (0)  


   messageicon The human race as a species is done. People are actually thinking Nicolas Cage is a vampire. Hooray for civilization.
←Rate | 09-19-2011 19:01 by Chris Comments (0)  


   messageicon Iron man is a superhero...iron woman is a command
←Rate | 07-11-2010 15:24 by chris Comments (0)  


   messageicon I live life on the edge, when I go grocery shopping I place all my eggs in the same basket! Thats just how I roll.
←Rate | 03-06-2012 17:22 by chris Comments (0)  


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