Funny Status Messages for Thanksgiving
Posted by TJ on Wednesday November 27, 2013 @ 03:08 PM
[Tags: humor, toplist, status]

Below are some funny status messages or tweets related to cooking,thanksgiving, and Turkeys. http://tjshome.com/statusmessages.php
  1. 802 X is Cooking pork chops in the toaster Submitted: 12-10-2008 13:11 by Richie
  2. 9770 X thinks my family is afraid of me cooking Thanksgiving dinner. I overheard them setting speed dials for the fire department, poison control...and the bomb squad... Submitted: 11-22-2009 23:09
  3. 9886 X is On this Thanksgiving I'm thankful for family and friends and the fact I don't have to wear Depends. I'm thankful for hard alcohol and seeing friends at the Mall, But most of all I'm thankful for turkey and stuffin' and SWEET, SWEET HOT LOVIN'!!!! Submitted: 11-25-2009 07:57 by T-Mart
  4. 9897 X says Thanksgiving is the one day each year day families get together…and remind themselves why they only get together once a year. Submitted: 11-25-2009 15:07
  5. 9903 X says Happy Thanksgivings...Screw the turkey, I want to stuff my woman... Submitted: 11-25-2009 17:46 by will
  6. 9911 X is I celebrate Thanksgiving in an old-fashioned way. I invite everyone in my neighborhood to my house, we have an enormous feast, and then I kill them and take their land. Submitted: 11-25-2009 21:37 by Benny
  7. 9920 X says May your stuffing be tasty, may your turkey be plump, may your potatoes and gravy have a nary lump. May your yams be delicious, And your pies take the prize, and may your Thanksgiving dinner stay off your thighs! HAPPY THANKSGIVING ALL.......... Submitted: 11-26-2009 02:01
  8. 9925 X says I love a Thanksgiving turkey... it's the only time in Los Angeles that you see natural breasts. Submitted: 11-26-2009 08:08 by Danmanz
  9. 9931 X is I love the Macys Thanksgiving day parade. Where you can watch your favorite stars lipsync to their hit songs! Submitted: 11-26-2009 10:44
  10. 9941 X Gotta love sharing a bathroom with elderly family after Thanksgiving Dinner...I feel like Andy Dufrain crawling thru those 200 hundred yards of pipe for freedom.... Submitted: 11-26-2009 16:59 by DS
  11. 9945 X All I said was .. "Just spread the legs open alittle wider and I'll stuff it in".....Geez thats the last time I try to help stuff a turkey ! Submitted: 11-26-2009 20:04 by SeanyB
  12. 9946 X is not sure what the words "PORN" and "POT" have to do with Thanksgiving ... but I know my Mom said both of them at the Dinner table tonight. Submitted: 11-26-2009 20:55
  13. 9949 X is Thanksgiving! The time of the year where the bathrooms are the busiest Submitted: 11-26-2009 22:47
  14. 9955 X some people call it Thanksgiving Day.....I call it "Bitc* Slap Vegetarian" Day Submitted: 11-27-2009 00:48
  15. 10205 X A poll found that 55 percent of shoppers start their Christmas shopping the day after Thanksgiving. The other 45 percent are men. Submitted: 12-03-2009 11:50 by tomcall
  16. 10297 X is I love cooking with wine. Sometimes,i'll even put it in my food. Submitted: 12-05-2009 05:13 by Lemonpillow
  17. 13222 X says Where there's smoke, the possibility exists I might be cooking... Submitted: 01-22-2010 10:44 by lemonpillow
  18. 17568 X is Shot my first turkey yesterday. . scared the $hit out of everyone in the frozen food section... It was awsome!!! Submitted: 03-23-2010 18:56 by chronic iam
  19. 18647 X is so why is that every holiday we stuff ourselves full of ham or turkey or whatever? like we really need an occasion to indulge our inner fat kid?? Submitted: 04-04-2010 19:46
  20. 18673 X says Cooking lesson #1: don't fry bacon in the nude. Submitted: 04-05-2010 10:03
  21. 18838 X I'm addicted to cold turkey and I don't know how to quit it. Submitted: 04-17-2010 23:32 by Vito
  22. 22202 X Dinner is no fun anymore since I stopped pretending I'm on TV when I'm cooking. Submitted: 06-11-2010 17:38 by Joser
  23. 33988 X says looking at the NFL schedule, the NFL needs to change who plays the Thanksgiving game. It should be Patriots vs. Redskins in Washington. Then, after the game, the Patriots kill the Redskins and take their stadium away from them... Submitted: 10-13-2010 22:23
  24. 36779 X You always feel a sense of accomplishment when you finally get that food stuck between your teeth with your tongue....So get ready for Thanksgiving. Submitted: 11-12-2010 19:29 by Danmanz
  25. 36848 X says if you are posting how many days there are until Christmas in November, you should have to do all the dishes after Thanksgiving dinner. Submitted: 11-13-2010 11:48
  26. 37134 X TURKEY - Coming soon to a table near you. Submitted: 11-16-2010 15:17
  27. 37495 X If your Thanksgiving plans include tofurkey, then you don't actually have Thanksgiving plans. Submitted: 11-19-2010 15:25
  28. 37524 X is Worried about traveling on Turkey Day, the full body scan screener may think I have a rilfe in my pants. Submitted: 11-19-2010 18:39
  29. 37530 X I'm not a chef. But I'd be happy to baste your turkey for you. Submitted: 11-19-2010 19:19
  30. 37563 X is Everyday is like Thanksgiving for me... people always give me "The Bird" and tell me to "Stuff It!" Submitted: 11-20-2010 07:31
  31. 37628 X can't wait for Thanksgiving!! No, not because of the meal and football games. Just found out I don't have to sit at "The Kids Table" again this year!!!! Submitted: 11-21-2010 08:33 by Steve OH
  32. 37674 X With Thanksgiving coming up..this year I thought I'd try something new, so my friend took me turkey hunting and I shot one! We had a ball but sure scared Hell out of everyone in the frozen food department! Submitted: 11-21-2010 11:41
  33. 37700 X If the Indians had given the pilgrims a donkey instead of a turkey, we'd all be getting a piece of ass on Thanksgiving.
  34. 37913 X Kanye West calls Thanksgiving "You're Welcome Day." Submitted: 11-24-2010 07:19
  35. 37915 X Thanksgiving is an emotional holiday. People travel thousands of miles to be with people they only see once a year. And then they discover once a year is way too often. Submitted: 11-24-2010 07:25 by Marshall the Great
  36. 37917 X I asked my kid, “Do you know why we have a Thanksgiving holiday?” He said, “Sure! It's so we know when to start Christmas shopping!” Submitted: 11-24-2010 07:28 by Marshall the Great
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