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   messageicon The Black Eyed Peas are just regular peas that got on an elevator with Ray Rice.
←Rate | 09-17-2014 13:44 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sorry I mispronounced your baby's name you made up.
←Rate | 02-17-2014 12:11 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sometimes I walk up to a plant and exhale carbon dioxide all over it. Did I save its life? Maybe. Am I a hero? That's for history to decide.
←Rate | 05-14-2014 05:39 by andrew jackson Comments (0)  


   messageicon DOCTOR: Are you sexually active? ME: Depends on what you mean by active. There are plenty of active volcanos that haven't gone off in years
←Rate | 05-25-2014 10:24 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Notice seen outside a Church: Please do not leave your Purse/Watch/Handbag/Mobile/Girlfriend/Boyfriend unattended. Others may think it`s an answer to their prayers.
←Rate | 11-18-2011 08:05 Comments (0)  


   messageicon When men give women roses they expect Tulips in return.
←Rate | 12-07-2011 13:05 by fadolo Comments (0)  


   messageicon I wear glasses because I like to dramatically remove them to display anger. It was awkward doing that with contact lenses
←Rate | 10-19-2011 10:52 by flinnie Comments (0)  


   messageicon I wish one of the walls in my bedroom was a giant Lite-Brite.
←Rate | 10-20-2011 10:07 by SuthernFukr Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just got legitimately excited when I remembered I can pay a person to drive a pizza to my house
←Rate | 12-28-2011 16:38 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon "Ramen". - Scooby Doo, finishing a prayer
←Rate | 03-09-2012 14:03 by SuthernFukr Comments (0)  


   messageicon Not everyone that comes into your life needs to stay there.
←Rate | 03-13-2012 15:19 by bfinest Comments (0)  


   messageicon TIP OF THE DAY: If you can't afford porn, just turn on tennis and shut your eyes.
←Rate | 03-22-2012 21:22 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Perspective is everything. The sinking of the Titanic was a miracle to the live lobsters in the ship's galley.
←Rate | 03-23-2012 09:06 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Attention All Mom: if you have a son from the ages of (6 to 12).. Just randomly ask him..."If 30 ninjas broke in here right now what would you do??" Trust me it will make his day...
←Rate | 03-24-2012 13:40 by bryan j brown Comments (0)  


   messageicon A recent survey of one person revealed that 100% of me thinks that I should leave work early today and get hammered.
←Rate | 03-27-2012 14:14 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon I got fired from my job as a bingo caller... apparently "A meal for two with a terrible view" was a pathetic way to announce the number 69.
←Rate | 03-27-2012 14:20 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon Only ghetto people go to a family party, complain about the food and STILL take 3 plates home.
←Rate | 03-29-2012 00:25 by fadolo Comments (0)  


   messageicon I want that "Damn you are still together?" Relationship!
←Rate | 02-21-2012 22:23 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon Dog's Facebook status: Tried to save the master from the vacuum cleaner today… He just yelled at me.
←Rate | 06-24-2012 05:22 by hihuggiehi Comments (0)  


   messageicon ''Hey, How was your Blind date?'' ''Terrible! He showed up in a 1932 Rolls Royce!''......''What's so terrible about that?''.....''He was the original owner!!!''
←Rate | 07-06-2012 08:25 by Abraham Lincoln Comments (0)  



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