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just saw a Prius with that brake problem. It was barreling down the road at speeds exceeding 35 MPH. 
"The greatest ironies of life: having the right person at the wrong time, having the wrong person when the time is right, and finding out that you love someone after that person walks out of your sight ...."
Crazy how people are more worried about getting Avocados then drugs and trafficing
Black person: Jeans $200, Shirt $100, Shoes $160, pockets.. $0 White Person: Jeans $15, Shirt $20, Shoes $30, pockets $5,000"
This white girl took me home last night. She wanted me to prove to her what they say about black guys is true....so I stabbed her and took her purse.
Friends are like a string of Christmas lights. Some are broke, some are burned out, others just don't work for you, a few aren't the brightest, some even need you to untangle the mess they are in..but most of them shine brightest when your day is darkest.
You'd think a community activist would have a better handle on the economy by now.
Having one child makes you a parent, having two makes you a referee and having more than two makes you a bouncer!
3 things I want in a relationship: Eyes that wont cry, lips than wont lie, and love that wont die.
wants a snuggie made out of sham wow material
Change is inevitable... Unless your a vending machine
Sat opposite an Indian lady on the train today , she shut her eyes and stopped breathing. I thought she was dead , until I saw the red spot on her forehead and realised she was just on standby.
"""remember JESUS LOVES YOU... It's everyone else who thinks you're an idiot."""
Stop Being Mean To Justin Bieber, She Has Feelings Too
Old rich white men selecting strong young black men to work on their fields? I'm not sure about this NFL Draft thing...
How do people dumb enough to buy $500 sunglasses make enough money to buy $500 sunglasses?
I'm cleaning out my car today, in case anyone needs 27 half-empty bottles of water.
Sometimes,,, I wish marriage between a man and woman was illegal too.
when what to my wondering eyes should appear, but 10 extra pounds on hip, thigh and rear
Caller ID should be more detailed~ "Wants Help Moving" "Going to Whine" "Will Ask to Borrow Money" 