Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon Life is short. Smile while you still have teeth
←Rate | 03-31-2011 14:31 by brandy Comments (0)  


   messageicon A chicken and an egg are lying in bed. The chicken is smoking a cigarette with a satisfied smile on its face and the egg is frowning and looking a bit pissed off. The egg mutters, to no-one in particular, "Well, I guess we answered THAT question!"
←Rate | 03-31-2011 14:16 by VJ Comments (1)  


   messageicon whys everyone so excited about opening day? I thought walgreens in town didnt open until tomorrow
←Rate | 03-31-2011 13:57 Comments (0)  


   messageicon We all have that one friend who needs to get laid. Well, at least my friends do.
←Rate | 03-31-2011 13:49 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why don't guys ever suck at singing? It's either good enough or surprisingly great. Of the girls I know, maybe two are amazing, the rest of us sound like drunken seagulls, and there's always one who can only be described as a serial ear murderer.
←Rate | 03-31-2011 13:47 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Men are like lottery tickets. Very exciting at first, until you scratch away the surface to reveal the loser beneath.
←Rate | 03-31-2011 13:18 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon I grew up with six brothers. That's how I learned to dance – waiting for the bathroom.
←Rate | 03-31-2011 13:17 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon : Things Change. Times change. I changed. you changed. :C
←Rate | 03-31-2011 13:14 by Attar Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just saw a commercial for the new movie "Hop". I don't think I'll ever look at jellybeans the same way again! ;)
←Rate | 03-31-2011 13:03 by JeremyCakes Comments (0)  


   messageicon My plan to impress people with big words has failed egregiously.
←Rate | 03-31-2011 12:53 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I want to be there when Google takes the street view picture of my address. The possibilities are endless.
←Rate | 03-31-2011 12:51 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon Did you blow Bubbles when you were younger? Well, he's back in town and wants your number.
←Rate | 03-31-2011 12:46 by Just wrong... heehee Comments (0)  


   messageicon visiting all 6.3 million web pages about 'obsessive personality'.
←Rate | 03-31-2011 12:42 Comments (0)  


   messageicon There's a distinct difference between power walking for fitness and power walking because you have to use the bathroom.
←Rate | 03-31-2011 12:42 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon Some parts of the world use Facebook to overthrow evil dictators. Me? I just want you all to know how delicious my sandwich is.
←Rate | 03-31-2011 12:39 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon that awkward moment when you realized that thousands of other people actually went to google and typed in "funny facebook status's"
←Rate | 03-31-2011 12:38 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Excuse me lady in the checkout line in front of me purchasing both a box of condoms and a pregnancy test... How's your day going?
←Rate | 03-31-2011 12:35 by Marshall the Great Comments (0)  


   messageicon When is it considered to early to start drinking...cause I think I'm 4 hrs behind!!!
←Rate | 03-31-2011 12:32 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Has anyone invented a time machine? If so, "when" did I get one?
←Rate | 03-31-2011 12:22 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just want to let you all know what the new Google homepage logo is all about. It is to celebrate the 200th birthday of Robert Bunsen who invented the Bunsen burner. So calm down all you local junkies...it is NOT a Meth lab!!!
←Rate | 03-31-2011 11:59 Comments (0)  



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