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I asked what to bring for Thanksgiving this year and my mom said it was up to me so I'm bringing a wireless router. 
The Wizard of Oz is 70 years old. Today, if Dorothy were to encounter men with no brains, no hearts, and no balls, she wouldn't be in Oz. She would be in congress...
Well on a positive note, Charlie Sheen.
Well No money November is going well this year
I think Americans need to find out who makes terrorist passports, apparently those things survive plane crashes and suicide bombs
Ah, I see my old arch nemesis, the bottom of the bottle, has arrived.
Always choose a proctologist with a good buttside manner.
Dramas are for women. Rationnals are for men.
Compliments are for women. Accusations are for men.
Why the hell don’t liquor stores have Black Friday sales?
The best part of hooking up with a MILF is leaving in the morning with a juice box and fruit rollups.
Because only in America, people trample others for sales exactly one day after being thankful for what they already have
: I am thankful that they finally discovered that the Tortoise was using Performance Enhacing Drugs in the race with the Hare.
USA: where you can go to the grocery store with a loaded gun, but where refugees fleeing war are scary for your safety you can shoot them.
90% of the refugees are young men, not women and kids.
2 days ago: ''We must help solve poverty here first and foremost!'' Today: ''All right! Black Friday is coming!''. Morons
Some of you should be required to raise your hand before you post to facebook.
Hey I just met you and this is crazy. Here's my number, I'm very lazy. Your dog resembles Patrick Swayze. Do you like daffodils? I'm craaazy
Black Friday challenge: Buy American and buy small business. Otherwise you're complaining for nothing about big business.
>>> Upset many will leave the home to go to a retail store where they can fight with complete strangers over unneeded and useless crap that our spoiled lives really didn't need in the first place. 