Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

   playin twister with a colorblind midget stripper called rainbow

   Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle

   a feeling that tonight's gonna be a good good night

   Jon Gosselin's secret lover

   thinks that your a great friend but when we're running from the zombies is gonna trip you.

   parachute for sale, used once, never opened!

   wonders if people who use sign language are allowed to talk with their mouth full....

   says that nothing is IMPOSSIBLE, the word itself says I'M POSSIBLE !

   without me awesome is only aweso

   Teaching my Son Life-Lessons.... Don't download porn.... Stream it....

   thinks we should keep the Earth clean. It's not Uranus.

   got up this morning and went to work at Chuckie Cheeses'....fml

   wondering if when French people swear, do they say excuse my English

   more things to do today than Micheal J. Fox could shake a stick at.

   a paranoid schitizophrenic, I think I'm following myself.

   has found out how to insult people using poetry terms, like you, you oxymoron!

   says his ambition in life is to turn no into yes!

   says it's been a rough day. I got up this morning .... put on a shirt and a button fell off. I picked up my briefcase and the handle came off. I'm afraid to go to the bathroom....

   browsing my facebook friends naked.

   smiling cause the little voices inside his/her head is whispering again and it tickles