Trump Filter: ON | OFF
Search Messages:
Breaking weather news! Winter storm Juno finally landed and was quickly deflated as it passed over New England. 
Maybe Jabba was extremly thin for a Hut, you don't know
A three-legged dog walks into a saloon and says "I'm lookin' for the man who shot my paw!"
Not really supposed to say anything yet, but… I joined Blink 182. Gonna take it in a super fun new direction.
You had me at 0 mutual friends
just avoid love at all costs
Social Media: Because I like to socialize with cool people without having to speak, wear pants or get off the couch.
So much anxiety, so little weed!
Some people are a lot funnier when they're on fire
Kentucky pickup line- I'm just goin to follow you home anyway, so get in the truck.
So...you got married, cheated on your spouse, got divorced and now can't seem to find a good, honest person?? Sounds like you just got owned by karma.
starting a chainsaw in the house is a great way to get the neighbors to quiet down. Also good for getting an unruly child's attention.
ATMs and automated gas pumps have been around for years but Wal Mart puts in self checkout lanes and people act like the world is ending...
My son wants to be a shrink when he grows up... Clearly I've failed to teach him our family's place in the psychiatric process...
Sometimes you have to cook ur own food and jerk off in front of your girl to show her that she can be replaced.
My gf just told me that my pecker was two inches bigger that her ex's and that's why she will never go back to a lesbian relationship
Every time a crossfitter gets injured an Angel gets their wings
When are Levi's going away with "Shrink to Fit jeans" to my style..."Stretched to Fit"?
You know that friend who says they'll be there for you even if it's 1 am. I am that person only because of insomnia. . .
FYI 'I'm here so I won't get fined'
Site Links
© 1999 - 2021 Tjshome.com
