Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon I still haven't been able to deal with the fact that Jessica Simpson has had two children and didn't name either one "Homer"
←Rate | 12-29-2013 04:36 by EF Comments (0)  


   messageicon 4/20? More like 1/5. Stupid stoners forgot to reduce their fractions
←Rate | 12-29-2013 07:01 by andrew jackson Comments (0)  


   messageicon For a guy who could turn water into wine, it’s surprising Jesus wasn’t a hit with the ladies.
←Rate | 12-29-2013 08:50 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm "when wrestling was the WWF, not WWE" years old.
←Rate | 12-29-2013 08:51 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Some women cook salt with a bit of food in it.
←Rate | 12-29-2013 08:57 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Religion is a spiritual joke thats gone too far.
←Rate | 12-29-2013 09:04 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Any girl can be glamorous. All you have to do is stand still and look stupid.
←Rate | 12-29-2013 09:11 Comments (0)  


   messageicon That last fart smells like why I am single.
←Rate | 12-29-2013 09:20 Comments (0)  


   messageicon They say one glass of wine a day is good for you. They never say how many times to fill it tho ;)
←Rate | 12-29-2013 09:48 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I can't believe Razor Companys are making any money.....$40 for 10 blades thet cost $.25 to make???
←Rate | 12-29-2013 10:51 by greg2missy Comments (0)  


   messageicon I love running my fingers through my girlfriend's hair. It's also a great way to let her know we're out of napkins.
←Rate | 12-29-2013 12:52 by BB Comments (0)  


   messageicon How many light bulbs does it take to change people?
←Rate | 12-29-2013 17:01 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon Give a vegan a fish,,, then never hear the end of it.
←Rate | 12-29-2013 17:06 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon We had our first meeting of the Rule Club... There was a fight.
←Rate | 12-29-2013 17:07 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm white,, but not "donates to PBS public television for $50 a month to receive a Free DVD of the programm I just watched for Free".. white.
←Rate | 12-29-2013 17:11 by snotty Comments (0)  


   messageicon Why isn't cat food made from birds, mice and squirrels??
←Rate | 12-29-2013 18:01 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just want to wish all my beautiful Facebook friends a Happy New Year. And for all those who get offended by my posts. I hope you die in 2014
←Rate | 12-29-2013 19:00 by Jackoo Comments (0)  


   messageicon Anybody else hate when youre mad at someone or upset at something they did, and instead of fixing the problem to make you feel better or acknowledge that they where wrong and simply say I'm sorry.. They turn it around get mad at you and make you to blame.
←Rate | 12-29-2013 19:16 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I went out to a "Soul Food" restaurant for dinner last night. My waiter was African-American and put my food down in front of another white guy who looked nothing like me. I get it now..........Wait, oh sorry, that's not my waiter
←Rate | 12-29-2013 20:47 by EF Comments (0)  


   messageicon What happens if pasta touches antipasta?
←Rate | 12-29-2013 21:06 by markf Comments (1)  



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