love Funny Status Messages

   Ladies; Love is giving him the remote...to your vibrator.

   I love how perfect you aren't.

   love is like lottery numbers....gotta keep finding the crappy ones before you get the good ones

   I turn every sexual experience into a love try angle.

   If you don't feel the love on Facebook then you're stalking the wrong people.

   there are 2 kinds of people in this world. Those who love beer and idoits...

   This b itch that started the whole "You can't hurry love" bullsh-it obviously gave terrible blow jobs.

   Our love making is great but it's the talking, cuddling and intimacy I enjoy the most…..ok, she's gone. It's really the sex!!

   When someone yells STOP, I don't know if it's In the Name of Love, it's Hammertime, or that I should Stop, Collaborate, and Listen.

   Love is such a strong word But then again, so is C*NT

   "A gripping tale of love and survival..." is how one reviewer described me tumbling down the stairs while trying to retrieve a stray M&M.

   love just isn't enough to keep two people together. You need money too to finance that shingding.

   Love is.......having sex with someone when you're sober.

   If love is a battlefield, and love is also blind, it makes sense why the outcome is always a huge disaster.

   Just wrote my wedding vows, it says, "I'll love & respect you, for fear of the death penalty for murder." Incase anyone wants to propose...

   You say "love means never having to say you're sorry" What I hear is that essentially your love is a narcissistic sociopathic minefield.

   Never forget to love your family.. because when everyone is in and out of your life, family is always there

   If you don't love me at my worst, good call. I wouldn't put up with me either.

   I love it when a beautiful woman is also intelligent. Makes spanking her ass bright red that much more rewarding for both of us.

   Love is when she throats you so deep she throws up on you, composes herself, then keeps going. She only regrets she had to stop for a moment.