Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
Page: 6146 of 6371
now in subsmission to the power of great stupidity
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02-05-2010 11:20
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won't be drinking alone tonight.......the verizon network will be with with her!
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02-05-2010 10:09 by Annelise
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when love is in the air I put on my gas mask.
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02-05-2010 09:42
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Never hit a man with glasses! A baseball bat does the job MUCH better!
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02-05-2010 09:39 by Talsier
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Kentucky man wins 128 million dollar lottery. Says he will share winnings with his wife and sister. Lucky woman!
They said the baby looked like me. Until they turned him the right way up.
Just started the all donut diet, or as I like to call it, Glazed Anatomy.
If you're happy, don't ask questions. Isn't that right ?
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02-05-2010 03:18 by Mmz
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dont cry because it is 0ver....smile because it happened..!!
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02-05-2010 03:01
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thinks playing COD with a laggy internet connection, is way harder than giving birth.
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02-05-2010 01:02
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Note to self, when meeting uncle Jack at the airport never scream "Hi Jack!!" ..again
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02-05-2010 00:19
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- Oh Facebook, you go through more Design Changes than I go through Women.
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02-04-2010 23:39
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Confucius he say, man who sit on tall toilet is high on pot...
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02-04-2010 23:20 by samdave69
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Why did some make a 'Piñata Endangerment Awareness' group on facebook??
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02-04-2010 23:10 by joe fool
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Friends teach you what you WANT to know. Enemies teach you what you NEED to know.
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02-04-2010 22:46
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I don't fail. I succeed at finding what doesn't work.
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02-04-2010 22:46
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There's a one-in six-billion chance that you'll find your soulmate. And that's if they're not dead
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02-04-2010 22:45
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Screwed-up people settle fights through violence. Screwed-up people start wars that could kill millions. Normal people settle fights through cookies, cakes, and pies. Normal people are fat.
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02-04-2010 22:44
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No problem is so big and difficult that it can't be blamed on somebody else.
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02-04-2010 22:44
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Take the time to smell the roses. Sooner or later, you'll inhale a bee and die.
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02-04-2010 22:44
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