Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
Page: 6091 of 6371
My laziness is becoming such a issue that I can't even be bothered hanging my clothes on my treadmill anymore
Viagra is now available in powder form for your tea. It doesn't enhance your sexual performance but it does stop your biscuit going soft.
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03-06-2010 15:15 by Y.P
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The sign it Said wet floor, So I did.
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03-06-2010 13:52 by Luka
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Today, I saw the commercial for the Snuggie. I still think it is stupid idea, but I couldn't change the channel because I was under a blanket and I didn't want my arms to get cold…
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03-06-2010 12:23
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If adam and eve weree only people god made Wouldn't that mean we are all related?
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03-06-2010 11:28
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What does it mean when your lady wears a Cleveland Browns jersey to bed.......U aint gonna score!
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03-06-2010 11:00 by jemava
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In a PBS world with a HBO mind...
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03-06-2010 10:59 by jemava
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A wise man washes his hands after he pees...... A wiser man doesn't pee on his hands.
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03-06-2010 10:58 by jemava
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Be vewy vewy quiet, I'm hunting wabbits!!
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03-06-2010 10:49 by jemava
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a W.T.F. Moment!... If fast food is so unhealthy then why is McDonald's the sponsor of the Olympics???
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03-06-2010 10:46 by jemava
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will give you advice now. If you are shopping for a gift for a child, do not buy Moon Sand. It doesn't matter if it costs $19.95 and comes in a brightly colored package, it's still WET SAND.
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03-06-2010 10:11
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If you smacked a kid in the face with a bottle of Johnson's No More Tears, would it create beautiful irony?
just heard that despite the universal success of the iPod and the iPhone; Apple will be releasing their next gadget EXCLUSIVELY for women... It will be called the iRon.
On a rural road a state trooper pulled this farmer over and said: “Sir, do you realize your wife fell out of the car several miles back?” To which the farmer replied: “Thank God, I thought I had gone deaf!”
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03-06-2010 06:16 by MG
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Sometimes I wake up GRUMPY; other times I let her sleep.
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03-06-2010 05:47 by MG
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DNA: National Dyslexic Association
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03-06-2010 05:46 by MG
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i love my PC, my friends live in it
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03-06-2010 03:07
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If you die in a jihad, you get 70 virgins. Unfortunately, they're all Persian.
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03-06-2010 01:11
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can't help but laugh when he hears jackie chan in the new karate kid say "now take jacket off"......"JACKET OFF" ......now that's subliminal messaging!
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03-05-2010 23:42
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I have many problems in my life, but my lips doesnt know them.. they always smile
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03-05-2010 23:31 by DARSHAN..
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