Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
Page: 5925 of 6369
I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant.
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05-12-2010 19:59 by Scooby
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not feeling himself today............ anyone else wanna try!!! :-)
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05-12-2010 18:00
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If you watch Rambo backwards, it's about a medic with a magical bullet vacuum.
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05-12-2010 17:39 by David
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Heaven doesn't want me & Hells just afraid i'll take over!!
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05-12-2010 17:38
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I'm only gunna give you half of it," the back half."
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05-12-2010 17:31
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You know you're getting fat when you sit in your bathtub and the water in the toilet rises.
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05-12-2010 16:52 by Mduduzi
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I SURVIVED Y2K, BIRD FLUE, SWINE FLU AND MAD COW DISEASE. 2012 BRING IT ON.
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05-12-2010 15:58 by BEGO
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how about a game of "just the tip"??
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05-12-2010 14:17
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Did I ever tell you about my roofer who came down with shingles?
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05-12-2010 14:00 by Joser
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Do they call him Prime Minister because you can't divide him up into multiple smaller ministers?
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05-12-2010 13:59 by Joser
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Cant believe why jews didn't come up with "my mind on my money and my money on my mind."
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05-12-2010 13:56 by Joser
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Can you imagine how painful walking would be if we all had foot balls?
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05-12-2010 13:55 by Joser
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you know what works better than a rape whistle? a rape pistol.
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05-12-2010 13:54 by Joser
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I'm not high maintenance, but rather precious cargo with lavish instruction for upkeep.
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05-12-2010 13:54 by Joser
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Every woman is wrong until she cries, and then she is right, instantly!
If carrots are so good for the eyes, how come I see so many dead rabbits on the highway?
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05-12-2010 12:51
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Why is there an expiration date on my sour cream container? :)
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05-12-2010 12:51
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Why be difficult, when with a bit of effort, you can be impossible
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05-12-2010 12:50 by Mduduzi
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Avoid being late, just don't show up!
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05-12-2010 12:43 by Mduduzi
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Sometimes too much to drink isn't enough.
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05-12-2010 12:43
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