Funny Status Messages and Tweets

Funny Facebook Status Messages or Whatsapp updates and funny tweets for Twitter.

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   messageicon Why is bra singular and panties plural?
←Rate | 08-21-2009 04:46 Comments (0)  


   messageicon The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
←Rate | 08-21-2009 04:46 Comments (0)  


   messageicon If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still #2?
←Rate | 08-21-2009 04:45 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon more confused than a baby in a topless bar.
←Rate | 08-21-2009 00:36 by The Gaddiman | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon last night I was lying in bed looking up at the stars and thinking ... Man, I really got to fix my roof!!
←Rate | 08-21-2009 00:12 by The Gaddiman | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon fighting racism through his equal hatred of everyone that isn't a beautiful woman.
←Rate | 08-21-2009 00:07 by olemissman79 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon doesn't mind you talk behind his back, just make sure while you're back there that you kiss his butt too.
←Rate | 08-20-2009 23:36 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon it's better to put the cats medicine down the throat...not the windpipe!
←Rate | 08-20-2009 22:51 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon made it his main ambition in life to put the fun back into funeral
←Rate | 08-20-2009 19:51 by Paul Johnson | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon that person your mother warned you about.
←Rate | 08-20-2009 16:28 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon wish I had a time machine to go back to 1968 so I could show all the pretty ladies what '69 is going to be like.
←Rate | 08-20-2009 15:30 Comments (0)  


   messageicon like Wow, my Farmville Farm runneth over....maybe I could get Michael Vick to thin my herds.
←Rate | 08-20-2009 10:04 by Andrea | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon killed Kenny... (You ba$tard!)
←Rate | 08-20-2009 09:16 by SP Comments (0)  


   messageicon feels like a Autobot in a world of Decepticons
←Rate | 08-20-2009 08:56 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon If some people hate Myspace, then why keep promoting your Twitter on it?
←Rate | 08-20-2009 06:04 by Danmanz | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon Out looking for insomnia, be back after I kill it.
←Rate | 08-20-2009 02:32 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon While driving yesterday I saw a banana peel in the road and instinctively swerved to avoid it...thanks Mario Kart
←Rate | 08-19-2009 23:43 by Mike Comments (0)  


   messageicon had one to many pregnancy scares tonight.
←Rate | 08-19-2009 22:37 by heavyt | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon you`ll notice after reading this notice, that this notice isn`t worth noticing... So why did you read this notice?
←Rate | 08-19-2009 22:30 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon wants to know if pregnant women in their ninth month are afraid to sneeze.
←Rate | 08-19-2009 21:41 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  




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