Funny Status Messages and Tweets

Funny status message updates for FaceBook or Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.

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   messageicon Age is not important unless you're a cheese or Wine.
←Rate | 08-11-2009 13:40 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon Brain cells come and brain cells go, but fat cells live forever."
←Rate | 08-11-2009 13:39 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon When spider webs unite, they can tie up a lion."
←Rate | 08-11-2009 13:39 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon Better to light one small candle than to curse the darkness."
←Rate | 08-11-2009 13:38 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon Smooth seas do not make for a skillful sailor.
←Rate | 08-11-2009 13:37 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon Forgiveness is not an occasional act: it is a permanent attitude."
←Rate | 08-11-2009 13:36 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon Creativity is the sudden cessation of stupidity."
←Rate | 08-11-2009 13:36 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon Vegetarian is an old Indian word meaning "bad hunter."
←Rate | 08-11-2009 13:35 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon will even let you hold the remote control
←Rate | 08-11-2009 13:00 by Ryan Seagren Comments (0)  


   messageicon ignored the lawful commands of his alarm clock this morning.
←Rate | 08-11-2009 12:17 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon preferred by 9 out of 10 dentists over the other leading brand.
←Rate | 08-11-2009 12:05 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon just found an awesome outdoor puerto rican mechanic shop! oh wait, its just the autozone parking lot...
←Rate | 08-11-2009 11:56 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon curiosity overpowers knowledge.. Now I have a midget transvestite prostitue knocking on my door
←Rate | 08-11-2009 08:53 by Yaj Comments (0)  


   messageicon Foolish man give woman Grand Piano, wise man give woman Upright Organ..
←Rate | 08-11-2009 08:32 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon Everything is "Prewritten" & Nothing Can Be "Re-Written"! So,Live the Best & Leave The Rest.......
←Rate | 08-11-2009 04:19 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon A Million Words Would Not Bring You Back, I Know Because I've Tried. Neither Would A Million Tears, I Know Because I've Cried.........
←Rate | 08-11-2009 04:19 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon Better never to have met you in my dream than to wake and reach for hands that are not there.
←Rate | 08-11-2009 04:19 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon I don't know what to do now that we're apart; I don't know how to live without the other half of my heart......
←Rate | 08-11-2009 04:18 | Tags: Filtered Comments (0)  


   messageicon Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else......
←Rate | 08-11-2009 04:18 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Anyone can give up smoking, but it takes a real man to face cancer.......
←Rate | 08-11-2009 04:18 Comments (0)  


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