Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
Page: 5790 of 6367
Social Networking is like Judaism based religions. 1st was Myspace, difficult to understand and these days they think there"special." 2nd came facebook; full of Hypocrites and false dreams. Lastly came Twitter; rarely understood by many and hated by most
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07-07-2010 21:10 by Tracy
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thinks that a couch in a nudist colony has to smell like ass.
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07-07-2010 20:45
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What happened to Swine Flu?
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07-07-2010 20:40 by Hetfield
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Don't knock the weather. If it didn't change once in a while, nine out of ten people couldn't start a conversation
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07-07-2010 20:37
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I wonder what a camel thinks of when he looks at his toe...
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07-07-2010 20:32 by mark
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I'm putting out my own sex tape. Sure, it's only duct tape, but you can use it for sex too.
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07-07-2010 19:41 by Leeferd
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doesn't care how many dirty looks he gets, he thinks it's funny when his 3 year old flubs up something in public and goes "Oh, Jesus Cwist!".
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07-07-2010 19:17
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I've missed you guys like a retard misses the point.
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07-07-2010 18:42 by Joser
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I'm never getting married. After learning another Bachelorette couple has split, I simply don't know what love is anymore.
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07-07-2010 18:42 by Joser
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Lingerie is just expensive wrapping paper.
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07-07-2010 18:41 by Joser
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"You look like you work out", said no one, to me.
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07-07-2010 17:53 by Joser
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headed out for a quiet beer. Followed by ten noisy ones...
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07-07-2010 17:52 by Joser
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it's impossible to fool-proof anything because fools are so ingenious.
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07-07-2010 17:52 by Joser
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there are more important things in life than money. The trouble is, they all cost money.
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07-07-2010 17:51 by Joser
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a bartender is just an under-qualified pharmacist.
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07-07-2010 17:50 by Joser
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A procrastinator's work is never done.
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07-07-2010 17:44 by Joser
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I wonder what the word for dots looks like in braille
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07-07-2010 17:38
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I like fruit baskets because it gives you the ability to mail someone a piece of fruit without appearing insane. Like, if someone just mailed you an apple you'd be like ‘Huh? What the hell is this?', but if it's in a fruit basket you're like ‘
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07-07-2010 17:35
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thinks the digital camera is a great invention because it allows us to reminisce. Instantly
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07-07-2010 17:33
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You may be out of my sight... but never out of my mind... I Miss You!
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07-07-2010 17:04 by Ohio
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